Mothers Day

[DonnaDel]

A Mothers Day Prose Poem (A little long, but worth it!)

Being a Mom

By Dale Hanson Bourke

We are sitting at lunch one day when my daughter casually mentions that she

and her husband are thinking of "starting a family."

"We're taking a survey," she says half-joking. "Do you think I should have

a baby?

"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral.

"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous

vacations."

But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my daughter, trying to

decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in

childbirth classes. I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child

bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional

wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable.

I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without

asking, "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every

house fire will haunt her. That when she sees pictures of starving

children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your

child die.

I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that no

matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to the

primitive level of a bear protecting her cub. That an urgent call of "Mom!"

will cause her to drop a soufflé or her best crystal without a moments

hesitation.

I feel that I should warn her that no matter how many years she has

invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood.

She might arrange for childcare, but one day she will be going into an

important business meeting and she will think of her baby's sweet smell.

She will have to use every ounce of discipline to keep from running home,

just to make sure her baby is all right.

I want my daughter to know that every day decisions will no longer be

routine. That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather

than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma. That right

there in the midst of clattering trays and screaming children, issues of

independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect that

A child molester may be lurking in that restroom.

However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself

constantly as a mother. Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to assure

her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but she will

never feel the same about herself. That her life, now so important, will be

of less value to her once she has a child. That she would give herself up

in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more

years, not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish

theirs.

I want her to know that a cesarean scar or shiny stretch marks will become

badges of honor. My daughter's relationship with her husband will change,

but not in the way she thinks. I wish she could understand how much more

you can love a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates

to play with his child. I think she should know that she Will fall in love

with him again for reasons she would now find very unromantic.

I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel with women throughout

history who have tried to stop war, prejudice and drunk driving. I want to

describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride

a bike. I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching

the soft fur of a dog or cat for the first time. I want her to taste the

joy that is so real it actually hurts.

My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in my

eyes. "You'll never regret it," I finally say. Then I reached across the

table, squeezed my daughter's hand and offered a silent prayer for her, and

for me, and for all the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this

most wonderful of callings.

Please share this with a Mom that you know or all of your girlfriends who

may someday be Moms. To all your friends, because we all have Moms.

May you always have in your arms the one who is in your heart

Happy Mothers Day Everyone :mopboystranger: