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Swansong

French Translation Needed!

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Greetings to our French speaking and writing members. I have a favor to ask. I have song that is part of my Phantom of the Opera novel in progress, Chanson de L'ange, which I would like translated from English to French. Would any of you lovely French ladies be willing to do this for me? The translation would appear in my book, and you would be credited for providing it.

Here is the song:

Chanson de L'ange

By Bonnie Anne Pinard 2006

When I close my eyes, your face is all I see.

Your voice and spirit, ever haunting me.

Through the mists of time, and in the mirror's glow,

you are all I love.... you are all I know

Sing to me again the angel's song.

Fold me in the wings of your embrace.

Hold me close until the stars have gone,

then will I behold... your beautiful face

When I lift my eyes, your shape suddenly appears.

Your touch on my skin, still lingers through the years.

Sorrows roll away like the ocean from the shore.

My heart entwined with yours, our love forevermore

Sing to me again the angel's song.

Fold me in the wings of your embrace.

Hold me close until the stars have gone,

then will I behold... your beautiful face

When I kneel to pray, it is your soul I crave.

Red roses bloom, in the shadow of your grave.

Through the shining gates, of heaven you draw near.

I hear you call my name, your angel's song I hear

Come with me my love let's fly away.

Come, the winter days grow long....

Come to me and sing your angel's song.

Thanks,

Swannie

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I gotta keep bumping this till somebody who speaks French sees it! LOL!

Swannie

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:wave: Hi Swannie!

Hope you're feeling better now ...

I think you need someone who's mother tongue is French - I started to translate your beautiful poem and I feel I am not doing it poetic justice. I can translate the words, but to get the same feeling to it, I think you really need to be a native speaker

Quand je ferme les yeux, je ne vois que ton visage.

Je suis hantée par ta voix et ton esprit.

A travers les bruines du temps et l'eclat du miroir,

je n'aime que toi... je ne connais que toi

(or maybe "je n'ai connaissance que de toi", but that's heavy, but it means more "aware of" in the sense of "knowing"- see, I'm getting bogged down already! LOL)

So maybe b-elle would be of more use to you than I might be .... or maybe we could do it together, if her English isn't up to it (but I think it might be), I could do the translation, and she could "polish" it into poetical French?

The only problem with that is that I'm going to be away until the beginning of April .... so if you're in a hurry ... and I'm still in a cybercafé, so I won't be able to see any posts this evening my time. :gah:

I *will* be at a friend's flat later today, around five my time, and I'll log on then to see if you've seen this :)

Hugs in haste

:hearts:

Sorsha

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:wave: Hi,

Swannie, I guess you've not been in yet today, so I'll be logging in next month ... Good luck with the writing :)

:hearts:

Sorsha xxx

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Thank you so much Sorsha,

I am in no real hurry, so if you and b-elle would like to work together, that would be wonderful. Even just the little bit you translated so far is beautiful.

I'll *see* you when you get back,

Swannie

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Hey Swannie -

Ok, it's been a bit since I actually took my five years of French, so I cheated and used the following website (it's amazing, bookmark it if you want to translate again).

I checked through the translation, as sometimes engines like this tend to be more literal than figurative in their checking. Anywho, looks close to me (some words don't mean exactly the same, but it'll do). In order to sing some of the longer phrases you (or I or Sorsha) may have to rephrase to use fewer words...I know you've sung in French before, so pronunciation is no problem. I must say, I DO love to sing in French. And Italian and Latin. It's just so much easier than German....

Quand je ferme mes yeux, votre visage est tout que je vois.

Votre voix et esprit, me hantant jamais.

Par les brumes du temps, et dans la lueur du miroir,

vous êtes tous amour de I.... que vous êtes tous je sais

Chantez-moi encore la chanson de l'ange.

Pliez-moi dans les ailes du votre embrassent.

Tenez-moi étroitement jusqu'à ce que tienne le premier rôle soient allés,

puis je voie... votre beau visage

Quand je soulève mes yeux, votre forme apparaît soudainement.

Votre contact sur ma peau, s'attarde toujours au cours des années.

Les douleurs roulent parti comme l'océan du rivage.

Mon coeur s'est enlaceré avec le vôtre, notre forevermore d'amour

Chantez-moi encore la chanson de l'ange.

Pliez-moi dans les ailes du votre embrassent.

Tenez-moi étroitement jusqu'à ce que tienne le premier rôle soient allés,

puis je voie... votre beau visage

Quand je me mets à genoux pour prier, c'est votre âme que j'implore.

Les roses rouges fleurissent, dans l'ombre de votre tombe.

Par les portes brillantes, du ciel vous approchez.

Je vous entends appeler mon nom, la chanson de votre ange que j'entends

Venez avec moi mon amour nous a laissés voler loin.

Venez, les jours d'hiver se développent longtemps....

Venez à moi et chantez la chanson de votre ange.

Hope that helps!

Jen

Edited by stagewomanjen

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Hi girls

I'm french !

This translation is pretty good ... but not exactly like we are speaking in French !

I translate (I need some times) and I write it for you !

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Thank you so much, b-elle.... how lovely of you to do this for me. I'm in no hurry, so please take your time.

Swannie

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Hey Swannie -

Ok, it's been a bit since I actually took my five years of French, so I cheated and used the following website (it's amazing, bookmark it if you want to translate again).

I checked through the translation, as sometimes engines like this tend to be more literal than figurative in their checking. Anywho, looks close to me (some words don't mean exactly the same, but it'll do). In order to sing some of the longer phrases you (or I or Sorsha) may have to rephrase to use fewer words...I know you've sung in French before, so pronunciation is no problem. I must say, I DO love to sing in French. And Italian and Latin. It's just so much easier than German....

Quand je ferme mes yeux, votre visage est tout que je vois.

Votre voix et esprit, me hantant jamais.

Par les brumes du temps, et dans la lueur du miroir,

vous êtes tous amour de I.... que vous êtes tous je sais

Chantez-moi encore la chanson de l'ange.

Pliez-moi dans les ailes du votre embrassent.

Tenez-moi étroitement jusqu'à ce que tienne le premier rôle soient allés,

puis je voie... votre beau visage

Quand je soulève mes yeux, votre forme apparaît soudainement.

Votre contact sur ma peau, s'attarde toujours au cours des années.

Les douleurs roulent parti comme l'océan du rivage.

Mon coeur s'est enlaceré avec le vôtre, notre forevermore d'amour

Chantez-moi encore la chanson de l'ange.

Pliez-moi dans les ailes du votre embrassent.

Tenez-moi étroitement jusqu'à ce que tienne le premier rôle soient allés,

puis je voie... votre beau visage

Quand je me mets à genoux pour prier, c'est votre âme que j'implore.

Les roses rouges fleurissent, dans l'ombre de votre tombe.

Par les portes brillantes, du ciel vous approchez.

Je vous entends appeler mon nom, la chanson de votre ange que j'entends

Venez avec moi mon amour nous a laissés voler loin.

Venez, les jours d'hiver se développent longtemps....

Venez à moi et chantez la chanson de votre ange.

Hope that helps!

Jen

Hi Jen.... wow, that is so cool! Actually, I won't be singing this in French. The lyric in French, will be part of an upcoming chapter. I really appreciate your help, ladies!

Swannie

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OMG, Jen, that website is awesome! I've been thing about putting my chapter titles all in French!

Hugs!

Swannie

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Dear Swannie

I discover your question only a few minutes ago ... So, I read the translations which were given, and ... I prefer to give you a good translation (I hope, but it seems to be in a better French as those I read).

Here it is :

Chanson de l’ange

Lorsque je ferme mes yeux, je ne vois que ton visage.

Ta voix et ton esprit me hantent à jamais.

A travers les brumes du temps, et dans la lueur du miroir,

Tu es tout ce que j’aime … tu es tout ce que je connais.

Chante avec moi à nouveau la chanson de l’ange.

Enveloppe-moi dans les ailes de ton étreinte.

Tiens-moi serrée contre toi jusqu’à ce que les étoiles viennent

Alors je verrai … ton beau visage.

Lorsque je lève mes yeux, ta silhouette soudain apparaît.

Le contact de ta peau s’attarde sur ma peau malgré les années.

Les chagrins vont et viennent comme l’océan sur le rivage.

Mon cœur s’entrelace au tien, notre amour durera à jamais.

Chante avec moi à nouveau la chanson de l’ange.

Enveloppe-moi dans les ailes de ton étreinte.

Tiens-moi serrée contre toi jusqu’à ce que les étoiles viennent

Alors je verrai … ton beau visage.

Lorsque je m’agenouille pour prier, c’est ton âme que j’implore.

Les roses rouges fleurissent, dans l’ombre de ta tombe.

Tu t’approches du Paradis par les portes lumineuses.

Je t’entends appeler mon nom, j’entends ta chanson de l’ange.

Viens avec moi mon amour, volons ensemble.

Viens, les jours d’hiver s’allongent …

Viens à moi et chante ta chanson de l’ange.

I hope I'm not too late for this translation ... but I don't have a lot of time to read all the messages on the forum (I'm a school teacher and have a lot of homework !). If you need some translation or some help, send me a MP ! I hope having help you ! And when your work about POTO will be ended, you could share it whith all of us ... I hope so !

A bientot !

Benedicte (Beelle)

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I read (after giving my translation) the translation Sorsha gave to you (the first paragraph) and it's more poetic than what I wrote. So I could only "polish" her translation if she could make one, just to see if it's a good French, but I think she's very comfortable in French (more than I am in English !).

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