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Guest DonnaKat

Over 18 section, PG-13 board

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Guest DonnaKat

First of all, let me say I'm not starting this thread with any intention of arguing or being a snot. I am honestly confused about this, and I'm sure there are others on this board that are confused as well. If they weren't, so many members wouldn't be getting called on the carpet. ;)

I saw that the "Official Spanker" posted in a few of the "Over 18" threads saying that members were pushing the envelope. The statement that confused me though, was this: "This is the over 18 section, but this is a PG-13 board". To me, that seems to be a contradiction of terms. It was my understanding that you keep it PG-13 above the panty line, and R is allowed in the Over 18. Otherwise, why would you even bother to have an over 18 section to begin with, if you're not allowed to post anything above a PG-13? :confused:

Again, I'm not trying to fuel anything, but I think a lot of members here need some clarification....and yes, I have read the official 'guidelines'.....but I'm still cornfused.

DonnaParanoidToPostAnythingNowKat

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Some people push the envelope too far if you get what I mean. Some of the stuff people post is so disrespectful. Would you really want Gerry to read that crap?

People don't know where to draw the line. Im not a mod but sometimes certain people push it past the point that they should and I find it offensive and downright ridiculous. It becomes not fun anymore and Im sure it has to also do with the agreement with the server provider. Seriously though people need to learn when to quit. I'm just sayin'!

Edited by RandomLanda

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Some members are confusing the term "Over 18" with "anything goes." That is simply wrong.

I agree with the Spanker. Just because you are Over 18, does not preclude the fact that this is a PG-13 board. "Over 18" does NOT mean we can take it all the way to the R-rated level. It means we can get closer to the R-rating, but we shouldn't completely cross the line.

The Owner of this site has entered into a hosting agreement with Inmotion. She has contractually bound herself to maintain a site that adheres to certain degree of decorum.

There is a difference between "randy fun" and flat out gross. There is no need to detail bodily fluids, the trajectory and landing place of same. Description of "hot nasty sex" is certainly taboo. "UNVEILED" use of terms describing "positioning," (canine), "marital aids" (B.O.B.s), ETC. is PROHIBITED. If you cannot come up with a fun and CREATIVE way to VEIL your true intended message, then don't post.

There is a reason we have managed to come up with such euphemisms as "chicken," "arriving," "B.O.B," "the Gorgo" etc. One, it's funnier. Two, if someone from inmotion was to review the site, unless the individual knew the context, she would not automatically assume "sex" to be the topic. Spambots do not pick up on words like "arriving" as having a sexual "trigger." However, terms like "hot nasty sex" do!

It's too easy to create our own definitions and terms for such "acts." There is no need to be so "in your face."

Finally, we have no way of knowing whether or not Gerry logs in to this site under a pseudonym. We can factually state that he's aware of GALS and thinks it's a "great site." We operate on the presumption that people (if not himself) peruse the site on his behalf -- that INCLUDES Over 18! When posting those over-the-top "scenarios" (as in the "what would you do if" gaming), ask yourself: "Do I really want Gerry to know I'm imagining him in such a situation?" "Do I really want Gerry's sister or mum knowing I'm imagining him in such a situation?" If you can answer those questions affirmatively, then go ahead and make the post.

It's not simply the graphic nature of the post, but the level of respect -- or in some cases "disrespect." Posting something that would only moderately embarrass you if he called you on the carpet is one thing. Posting something that may hurt his feelings or anger him if he reads it personally, is something else. (Personally, there are most certainly posts out there that would make me blush should Gerry ever say, "Oh, you're Spot. So you'd like me to..." However, knowing Gerry's penchant for flirty behavior, I'm sure I could chalk it up to being a GAL. I don't THINK I've got anything out there which would require an "apology" to him. That's the difference.)

If you need further clarification or examples of what was deemed offensive, you'll have to PM me. I cannot go into such details without violating guidelines myself.

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Guest DonnaKat

Thanks Spot. For the record, I totally agree with everything you and Landa said. I just wanted to make sure there wasn't something I personally was doing wrong. But I guess if that were the case, a Mod or Admin would be PM'ing me asking me to curb it. :lol:

I agree about the respect thing. It's a personal rule of mine to never post anything I wouldn't want the person in question to read (except for maybe my own mum or dad...LOL). I'm not perfect, though, and sometimes I post something and later say to myself "girl, you were out of line". And there are days I'm a bit more unadulterated than others, depending on my mood.

Again, thanks for the clarification. It's much appreciated.

Edited by DonnaKat

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But I guess if that were the case, a Mod or Admin would be PM'ing me asking me to curb it. :lol:

Yes, we would. And we don't do that lightly. We don't like having to tell folks to edit their posts. It isn't part of the "fun" for us, believe me.

As I'm sure you've heard on the board before, if you have to wonder if it's too much for the board, it probably is so edit yourself accordingly. If somewhere in your post, you feel the need to say "I wonder if I'm gonna get spanked" then please don't post it. Being spanked or asked to edit your post shouldn't be a badge of honor. It creates a frustrating situation for all involved.

The romance novels that you can find in the bookstore are probably the best guideline that I can think of for how to think about your posts. You probably wouldn't want your 12-14 year old girl reading those types of books but for your older teenage daughter and above it's fine. If you've gone into that realm of conversation, then put it in Over-18. But romance novels aren't porn and I think most of us realize the difference.

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Wonders what marital aids are.

Love,

Tracy :unsure::confused:

P.S.

I wouldn't want anyone under 18 reading my love scenes in the over 18 boards, but I know mods are in there so if I am ever naughty spank me. I do not mind editing. Then again I like to pretend kids don't watch or read naughty things. I sure like to pretend they don't do naughty things, but heck I should know better.

Edited by JustCallMeTracy

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:funnyup: Toys sweety!

And just my cents, just cuz you aren't directly PMed by a mod we shouldnt assume we can do whatever. Self modification is better than waiting to see if you cross the line.

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Thanks for the clarification! I mainly laugh my butt off at the WWYDI Section. Thanks to the Mods to keeping the site alot of fun!

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:funnyup: Toys sweety!

And just my cents, just cuz you aren't directly PMed by a mod we shouldnt assume we can do whatever. Self modification is better than waiting to see if you cross the line.

That's true. I guess there are somethings I am unsure about so I should try to be careful. My problem is my characters do things I would never do so of course I think it is wrong, but is it wrong by Gals' standards? I will try and be careful. I would never want to cause trouble deliberately. Oh thanks, Dawn I am dumb about such things.

Love,

Tracy

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I feel very responsible for all this. I know that my posts in the Over 18 section were cause for concern, and when I realized this I removed them.

Now, this IS JUST ABOUT ME! ONLY ME . . . NO ONE ELSE.

I'll express what I've experienced this week: I have a dark side to my personality. While I was actually enjoying writing the erotic scenarios, it also took me to a place in my head about Gerry that I had NEVER wanted to go. I always prided myself on being the type of fan that Gerry would be proud to have - one that puts his needs and wants above my own. One that shows him RESPECT and HONOR above any other emotions that I might feel. I wanted him to be able to say, "Oh Phoenixgirl . . . yeah, I like her posts." You know what I mean . . . he would never do that, but you get my drift.

I need to remember why I joined GALS and what keeps me here. I love getting randy about Gerry with my friends in a chat, but that's where it needs to stay.

So, I have to say this FOR ME AND ME ALONE . . . if Gerry or any of his family members or staff people are reading this, I so apologize if I have offended any of you, especially Gerry and his family. Never my intention at all. It hurts to think that I may have, so I'll chose to believe that no one that knows him has seen anything I wrote below the pantyline.

I will continue writing my Lost In Paradise story. I'm very proud of that. I'll keep my fantasies where they belong - in my mind . . .

Thanks for letting me share this.

Oh, and I'm very grateful to the Mods and Admins who have been gentle with me about all this. They do their job very well.

:hearts:

Lisa

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Be careful when you say "romance novels you find on the shelf of a book store", Jilly! Some of them are way too racy to be posted in Over-18.

:funnyup: I should know, I've been spanked for following that little rule! When in doubt, star it out or do a PM Only version!!!

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Good point, AimeeMarie.

Especially the "when it doubt PM it" part.

I guess I meant the romance novels that I read.

Gee, Aimee. What are YOU reading.... Wait. Don't answer that. :lol:

:hugs: to you and see you SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!

:kiss: :kiss:

Edited by discoveringme

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I have to say, I think there have been more than a few really pushing the envelope posts lately, I've done it in the past and I've either wrangled myself in or changed direction, but there have been times lately it goes on and on and on, and I'm not a prude at all, don't get me wrong, but even for some over 18 sections it can go a little too far.

The Mods are so busy with the Con coming up, add in everyone has RL that is hectic as well, sometimes it's much easier to just edit yourself to give them a break.

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But romance novels aren't porn and I think most of us realize the difference.

Woman, I'm buying you a drink for that sentence alone!! :kiss:

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I guess I meant the romance novels that I read.

:kiss::kiss:

Uhhh, Jilly, maybe you should reconsider buying my books then....I doubt my romance novels would be allowed on here! :lol:

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I can't wait to buy Leslie's books at Vegas!!!

I have one more thing that I have been thinking about all day . . .

I think that the lack of news and pics about Gerry have maybe made us a little "stir crazy" and really having to come up with things to discuss or whatever. I'm wondering if tension and tempers are a bit high and things got out of hand due to restlessness. I don't think for one minute any of us ever meant for things to get so out of hand, or for arguments to begin. I just think that we're . . . well . . . bored? Not with the board, mind you . . . with the lack of RECENT Gerry goodness.

I mean, we were like a flock of VULTURES in the thread when Moira found a new pic! Know what I mean? I think that's PART of what's going on right now.

Just my own observation and opinion. Doesn't mean anything to anyone but me . . .

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Guest Nay

I feel very responsible for all this. I know that my posts in the Over 18 section were cause for concern, and when I realized this I removed them.

Now, this IS JUST ABOUT ME! ONLY ME . . . NO ONE ELSE.

I'll express what I've experienced this week: I have a dark side to my personality. While I was actually enjoying writing the erotic scenarios, it also took me to a place in my head about Gerry that I had NEVER wanted to go. I always prided myself on being the type of fan that Gerry would be proud to have - one that puts his needs and wants above my own. One that shows him RESPECT and HONOR above any other emotions that I might feel. I wanted him to be able to say, "Oh Phoenixgirl . . . yeah, I like her posts." You know what I mean . . . he would never do that, but you get my drift.

I need to remember why I joined GALS and what keeps me here. I love getting randy about Gerry with my friends in a chat, but that's where it needs to stay.

So, I have to say this FOR ME AND ME ALONE . . . if Gerry or any of his family members or staff people are reading this, I so apologize if I have offended any of you, especially Gerry and his family. Never my intention at all. It hurts to think that I may have, so I'll chose to believe that no one that knows him has seen anything I wrote below the pantyline.

I will continue writing my Lost In Paradise story. I'm very proud of that. I'll keep my fantasies where they belong - in my mind . . .

Thanks for letting me share this.

Oh, and I'm very grateful to the Mods and Admins who have been gentle with me about all this. They do their job very well.

:hearts:

Lisa

That took a lot of courage to say openly and honestly, PGirl! (Hey PG! I like that new name and rating) Bravo :hug1:

Thanks DK for starting this thread because as a "green one" I too was disturbed and confused as to responses and directions. Some things are now clarified. Others are not and may never be.

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Yes lisa

I am sure Gerry only reads your lost in paradise thread anyway - and that is what he would remember PhoenixGirl for :kiss:

I don't really participate too much in the over 18 forum but know you can use a character but not the real Gerry - I guess when you like Gerry Kennedy the best it would be hard for people to not think you maybe mean the real thing!

Luvs Ya

Moira

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Lisa, :hearts:

That did take a lot of courage to post and bravo for being so honest and open. I also feel largely responsible - I did get carried away. I want to apologize to everyone on this board and to the MODS and to Gerry and his family and friends who might have read those posts. It was never my intention to disrespect anyone. I went back through the threads and edited all my posts. This Gal still wants to have fun on this board because the people here are really wonderful, but this Gal also has learned her lesson! I hope that everyone who had taken any offense at all forgives this humble Gal and gives her a second chance..... :rose:

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Guest DonnaKat

I'm not sure about boredom, but I do know that it's human nature to feed off one another. If someone starts with something a little racy, someone else is probably going to respond with something even racier, etc. I don't think it's restlessness, I think people were just having fun and got out of hand. I know tempers tend to flare and emotions rise whether or not there's any new pictures or news. Just remember the whole CUT thing a few months back, then there was the whole "Gerry's with (insert name here)" rumor thing, and the bad paparazzi pics, etc.

I know this is a fun place to be, we enjoy posting, and yes at times we get upset with one another. After all, we all have our good and bad days. But I have to ask: is it really worth it to jeapordize a friendship with someone over something so trivial as a comment made on this board, or a disagreement over whether Gerry's clothes match or whether or not he's dating someone? Discussions are fine, but when people cross the line and stop speaking to one another over something that has nothing to do with them personally, I think it's time to step back and re-evaluate the situation. And I'm not pointing fingers at anyone, so please don't misunderstand me. It's just something I wanted to get off my chest.

The one thing I liked about this site when I joined was that members acted with the utmost respect. But I think it's important to remember that in our efforts to respect Gerry, that we not forget to respect one another. After all, GALS have feelings too. ;)

And to PhoenixGirl: We all have dark sides, Lisa. While mine might not show itself in quite the same way as yours, nevertheless I can have a nasty temper - and when it flares, I say things I don't mean. Believe me, I know my faults better than anyone else and I've been dealing with my personality my whole life. :lol: So don't be so hard on yourself - none of us are perfect, nor are we expecting you to be. It took a big person to do what you just did, and in my book that makes you special. :hugs:

Edited by DonnaKat

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Hey Donna

That is exactly what I said to Lisa that we all feed off each other and when we start we all join in and encourage each other and before we know it - we've crossed that line.

There has been alot of tension of late and we have to get back to remember the reasons that brought us here and more importanlty keep us here.

The last thing we need in Vegas is one side of the room not talking to the other side ha ha :funnyup:

There has been alot of negative stuff in Gerryland since CUT and I know I hate the rumours about his love life as much as the next GAL but deep down I have to accept that man is getting older and can't remain single for ever and just want him to be happy. I have my idea of who he should be with and unfortunately have to accept that may not be his!!!!! :funnyface:

If I have one wish it is that if Gerry does settle down and have that little scottish baby that alot of fans don't fall by the way side. I do wonder if half are here because he is the epitomy of the perfect available man. I know alot of you are married so even though you lust after him I expect it is more about the talent than anything else.

Moira

Edited by framolamdu

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Donna, you said EVERYTHING I wanted to say on this thread...but you managed it better than I could right now. I also know that I was extremely confused about the "Over 18 Section" on a "PG-13" board and really should have asked what, precisely, did that mean? Because it sounds contradictory at first glance but now I'm realizing that it isn't.

I know that I've gotten carried away at times, but it was due to a sense of timing, comedy and racy spirit and never meant to disrespect Gerry. Now I see how it could have disrespected him in some fashion, and I feel badly about that. I think the world of the guy and would never want him to feel uncomfortable. Having said that, I don't mind if the mods or admin remove or edit any of my posts. If someone feels that I've crossed the line, then I want to know (because sometimes I can be a blockhead and not recognize just how naughty I can be!).

Anyway, I also want to apologize to any of the GALS if they were offended by anything I said. I will definitely become more cautious when I post in the "Over 18" Section now.

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Ladies,

Thank you, each and every one of you who have posted, for your heartfelt sentiments and apologies.

Certainly, no ONE person was singled out, and there has been plenty of blame to go around (I think pretty much ALL of us have "been there" at one time or another). But I appreciate those of you who felt compelled to admit you had a hand in it and have apologized and vowed to do better. I don't think anyone could or should expect more than that and I admire each of you for it!

I am sorry that some of you who are relatively new to the board were innocently led down the wrong path. I agree with DonnaKat in that we do feed off of each other. Also, please try to understand that it is extremely difficult to pare down the guidelines to such specifics as one may want at first blush. This can become quite constricting and we want to stay as far away from that as we possibly can. It's something we on the Moderating Team have struggled with; to find some kind of happy medium, that also spells out the posting guidelines concisely and clearly.

As a member of The Mod Squad, I apologize for letting anyone down by not being more mindful of the content on the over 18 board. I will strive to do better in that capacity.

Thanks everyone!! I LOVE MY GALS!!

:hugs:

Katie

~Songbird~

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I hope to goodness I have never written anything that would embarrass Gerry. Now I have written randy scenes for Meg and Erik. Even randier ones for Tracey and Archie, but they are not Gerry. They just look like Gerry.

I will be more mindful even what I write for them though,

Gerry's personal life is none of my business.

I can't even do a sexual Gerry Gasm in the game section.

I have to make it silly now I can his characters, but then usually I pretend I am a character.

I don't want to kiss, snog or shag this man.

I am in love with my husband.

I have great respect for Gerry's work, but that is where it begins and ends for me.

I hope I am always respectful to the guidelines of these boards.

I will try and be very careful when I post.

I hope I disappoint no one.

Love,

Tracy

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Guest DonnaKat

My only concern in everyone trying to tone it down so much is that we do it to the extent that the board becomes dry, lifeless, and boring. I'd hate for this board to lose it's spice. Truth is, we're never going to please everyone. A post someone makes might be well within the guidelines of the forum, yet might still offend someone on the board. That's life. You can't please all of the people all of the time, and if truth be told, some people are never pleased with anything you do.

And I don't think anyone here was deliberately trying to run amuck just because there was a convention coming up, either. We're aware there are mods and admins perusing the threads, and the last thing I think anyone was thinking was "what can we get away with because they're planning this convention". Most people probably don't know whether or not their posts are being scrutinized, up until they get the dreaded PM or the warning post.

I wasn't sure about starting this thread, but now I'm glad I did. I think it's healthy for people to air out their feelings with each other like this. Otherwise the place gets stagnant and stinky. :)

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