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Gerard Butler GALS

I've decided COME WHAT MAY


Abrock
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There is actually a chance that I may fail every one of my classes this semester. :depressed: I know, not too cool. I'm hoping to escape with C's. Maybe. I have one class that I KNOW I will fail, because I was just too far behind. I talked with the professor and told him that I was retaking it next semester. He was cool with that, so even though he has to fail me, he knows I'm not a flake and will continue to try.

So, you know...if I do fail my classes and I'm put on academic probation...so be it. *sigh* I'm not intellectually challenged. I'm smart enough, dammit, but...I have so many problems focusing (going to the doc next week to be tested for ADHD) and I already have the depression problems. GEH! Sorry to dump all this here, but FTB...I'm so tired of school and failing it all the time! I've been a bad student my whole life. Right from the beginning, when my kindergarten teacher sent home less-than-happy notes to my parents, convinced I was far too young to be in school (I had JUST turned five when I started). That stigma has followed me around my whole life. I didn't know about these notes until years later, but I knew I was struggling. I've always struggled in school, I have a constant knot in my stomach from September to May every year.

I'm tired of...

People telling me I need to set aside time to study.

That I need to set up a "schedule" for myself.

To not do any shows or whatnot during the semester (because even when I don't...like this semester...things fall apart).

That I just need to find my thirst for school.

Been there, fookin' done all that!

I'm tired. In so many ways.

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Abrock, I wish I could to help you through these days, but all I can do is pray, which I most certainly will. Try not to let the past take control, Doll and just deal with today. Take it one day at a time, don't worry about yesterday, hope in today, and only deal with tomorrow when it comes. Our prayers are with you, and I'm praying about the ADHD testing. Keep us informed as things progress.

Beachie

Edited by givemeabeach
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Oh, Abrock, I've worked with a few students just like yourself, all of them very very bright and with the ability to suceed. I'm so happy to say that I know 2 out of 3 (and I'm not worried in the least about the 3rd one) graduated this very semester!! Well, no one already had graduated but it was so cool to see them reach that point, and they were both so excited. I know you'll do fine. It can be tough sometimes. Here's to wishing you a better semester next time around. I'm struggling right now with generating an Ok paper, and the urge to simply toss it out the window! And now my throat hurts and I'm back on gbgals when I should be just writing lol!! So, I know what ya mean about focusing...it's still hard in grad school bleh!

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Hey girl!

Ok, time to spill. Listen, I graduated college with a hard-earned 3.25 CGPA. But I DID fail a class. And I got plenty of Cs (I think a D too, but I can't remember). I started out as a psychology major, but in the first semester of my sophomore year, I decided to go with Biology. I liked it, but it was friggin' hard!

So I took physics. I took calculus. I took chemistry, A & P, and all the other crap science classes. But my undoing was Organic Chemistry. It ate a hole in my life. Not to mention the lab part of it, that took hours in class and hours out of class to get ready. Plus I was taking a regular load of science classes and labs at the same time. So it came down to a decision - fail O chem and take it again, or fail everything. So I got past Vertebrate Physiology with a C and physics with a B, but I failed the chemistry.

It sucked. A LOT!

I started college as an honors student, I was in the top ten percent in high school. I knew that I was in class among some of the smartest students in the University, but this class (with a crappy teacher), was just too much. So I took my lumps, and I went back and took it again, followed by another hellish semester of Organic to graduate. I managed a B and a C the second time around, and I've never worked so hard. I heard all of the advice that you did...including "get a tutor" from my parents...and "just concentrate".

It still sucks, and most people don't know what it's like to consider yourself smart and yet be failing a class. So don't doubt yourself, don't doubt your intellect. Sometimes it's a teacher or extenuating circumstances, or just that you're overloaded.

Just hang in there girl! You can do it! I just had to decide that there were a lot of things in life that were tough, but that THIS thing, (damn organic chemistry!!!!!) was NOT going to beat me.

Good luck!

Jen

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Thanks for your replies, girls. I went to the doctor, he's putting me on a trial med for ADD. We'll see how it works. If it worsens, that's a sign of bipolar disorder, if it helps, then I'm probably ADD. At least I'll be trying this out during a break from school. :smile:

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Abrock, you're in my prayers. I was always a stellar student until high school when depression devoured me and my train of thought, and I began to earn Cs and Ds for the first time in my life...and nobody helped me or inquired about what might be lacking in my life. I just struggled all the time. In college I was up and down...Dean's List one semester, failing a class the next...and I just could not concentrate. About two years ago I was diagnosed with cyclothymia (a lesser form of bipolarism) and ADD, though my current psych doc begs to differ with that evaluation. Suffice it to say that I don't know WHAT I am...but I've been too scared to attend grad school because of this problem. Twice I've applied for the teaching program and twice I've backed out with the willies. While we're not in the same exact situation, I think it's close enough to warrant some understanding on my part. I will be thinking of you and hoping for the best.

hugs,

Christine

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Thanks, GALS...and Christine, I totally understand. Sometimes I'm doing great, but then for no reason...downhill. I understand your fear of going to grad school...you just never know when everything is going to hit the fan and render you functionless. :depressed:

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Abrock - hoping the new med helps! My sister always struggled too, but she managed to get through and got her masters degree too.

Jen - your story is so alot like mine in some ways. I ended up with a 3.0 but through my first 2 years itwas more like a 2.0. I couldn't decide on a major but started out in Medical Technology and Microbiology. It was Organic Chemistry that got me too - I had a 10 on one of the big exams (out of 100) and finished the class with a D (not an F only because I had a B in the lab part and the classroom and lab grades were combined). But I never took it again. After that year I transferred schools and anything below a C didn't transfer, and I switched majors to business which is where I finished up and didn't need any more science classes. I actually did better in grad school than I did in undergrad, probably because there was more pressure to succeed AND because I finally had an idea what I was going to do with my life so I paid more attention.

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Thanks, GALS...and Christine, I totally understand. Sometimes I'm doing great, but then for no reason...downhill. I understand your fear of going to grad school...you just never know when everything is going to hit the fan and render you functionless. :depressed:

Yep, exactly. It's hard to get a grasp on it. I wish you oodles of good fortune, though...which med will you be taking? (I'm sorry if you mentioned it already; it just proves that my powers of observation and focus really suck!) And please let us know how you're doing!

hugs,

Christine

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No, I don't think I mentioned it. Thanks, Christine, and everyone. I so do love it here. :wub:

It's uh...starts with an "A"....shoot, I can't remember what it's called! Huh. Aderall? Something...like that? Today's my first day on it, we'll see how that goes!

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No, I don't think I mentioned it. Thanks, Christine, and everyone. I so do love it here. :wub:

It's uh...starts with an "A"....shoot, I can't remember what it's called! Huh. Aderall? Something...like that? Today's my first day on it, we'll see how that goes!

Oh yea! Aderall! I've heard only good things about it and its effects. I really hope it works wonders for you! Right now I'm taking Effexor, Neurontin and Valium...but it's a lot better than a year ago when I was imbibing about six or seven different drugs! I managed to whittle it down, thank God, because I worked on myself diligently. I'll probably always need to be on an anti-depressant, though. *sigh* Keep us apprised of your progress on the Aderall...

hugs,

Christine

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Eureka, I got the name right! :dance3:

I hear you about anti-depressants...maybe I'll always be on them. But I hope to wean down the dose, I'm up to 50 mg right now, good night that's high.

I have high hopes for Aderall...I really hope it helps, then perhaps I can put my brain to good use. :smile: And thank you for reminding me...a lot of the progress is working on myself, and letting God intervene! No good if I shut Him out...

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::D: Abrock I hope this works well for you. You are very intelligent you know,(we all know it) School is a pain, but worth it!!! (right??) I have the hardest time not letting my grades determine who I am, but the truth is that I just have to accept them and me for they are. Grades even C's are more step forward that I've taken, and that alone is something to celebrate. Not waiting for your life to come to you, but going out and grabbing for it, is really scarey but also worth the effort. Your grades don't define you either, you are brave and strong. Going into this life (with God's help) and making your place in it! :;): Good job woman!!

You'll always be straight A's with us you know.

(((HUGS))) Toni

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Jen - your story is so alot like mine in some ways. I ended up with a 3.0 but through my first 2 years itwas more like a 2.0. I couldn't decide on a major but started out in Medical Technology and Microbiology. It was Organic Chemistry that got me too - I had a 10 on one of the big exams (out of 100) and finished the class with a D (not an F only because I had a B in the lab part and the classroom and lab grades were combined). But I never took it again. After that year I transferred schools and anything below a C didn't transfer, and I switched majors to business which is where I finished up and didn't need any more science classes. I actually did better in grad school than I did in undergrad, probably because there was more pressure to succeed AND because I finally had an idea what I was going to do with my life so I paid more attention.

Susan....

My first O chem exam was a 16 (out of 100)....gotta love THAT! I hear you! Always nice when the class average on an exam is a 45%.....

Ya know, there are some times when I miss being in school.....(and then I wake up!!!!) :kisswink:

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::D: Abrock I hope this works well for you. You are very intelligent you know,(we all know it) School is a pain, but worth it!!! (right??) I have the hardest time not letting my grades determine who I am, but the truth is that I just have to accept them and me for they are. Grades even C's are more step forward that I've taken, and that alone is something to celebrate. Not waiting for your life to come to you, but going out and grabbing for it, is really scarey but also worth the effort. Your grades don't define you either, you are brave and strong. Going into this life (with God's help) and making your place in it! :;): Good job woman!!

You'll always be straight A's with us you know.

(((HUGS))) Toni

Thank you, Toni. *happy sniff* For a long time in high school, I let my grades determine what I thought of my intelligence...until I because good friends with a right smart fellow, who taught me that I have a brain. ::D: No, really...he taught me to think of myself as intelligent, and it was beautiful. Yes, I'm generally crap at school, but I value education in all forms, and just because I learn differently than others doesn't mean I'm not just as smart.

*sigh* I love it here. :wub:

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:inlove: This place is awesome huh!

In high school grades just came to me, never really had to work for them, in fact most of the time I was bored silly. NOW however, is totally different. I study hard, but the kids and job and all that, I'm just having a hard time this year. My grades at mid-term were a real wake-up call for me. My accounting prof. told me to chill, and be sure and give myself 1. a little credit

2. a little time for just me - not school - not home - just me. I think the may have been the best advise I've ever gotten. After I relaxed a little, my grades improved some ( not a lot) but my attitude is much better. The real world wants to know that I can do the job, not that I had a B- in english. I am learning, and when I graduate I will be able to do the job sooo :funnyface:

I guess all this ramble really is about is this, you're not alone. There are a few of us that feel your pain (completely hehe) (((HUGS))) Toni

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$%@$^*$#!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Two classes grades in...two F's so far.

Aww babe!

Stupid stinkin' college!!!! I know it doesn't help you now, but at least it's over for awhile, you get a bit of a break! You can come back and tackle these, (we all know you've got it in you!!!!), and when you do, the grades get better. Besides, believe me, NObody looks at your college GPA as long as you don't major in underwater basket weaving.....

Keep the faith girl! All the GALS are pulling for you!

Jen

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$%@$^*$#!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Two classes grades in...two F's so far.

Ab, I know it's easier said than done, but don't worry. It's just THIS semester. You can always pull yourself up by the bootstraps, with the aid of the Adderall, next semester. If I managed to do it in college (fail two courses one semester and then get Dean's List the following semester), you can as well. I can tell that you are smart as a whip...so please forgive yourself and look forward to kicking booty in the months to come. We are cheering for you!

love and hugs,

Christine

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Thanks girls. :depressed: Another depressing thought is that I'll probably be in school for an extra semester. *sigh* But that's okay, I'll get through. I'm just glad I have a place like this with so many supportive people.

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That's ok Abrock, we can share that pain together, I too was stuck like 2 extra dang semesters b/c of Internship, I just need to make the best of it, the victory at the end will be all the more sweeter because of it!

"Thanks girls. Another depressing thought is that I'll probably be in school for an extra semester. *sigh* But that's okay, I'll get through. I'm just glad I have a place like this with so many supportive people."

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Okay, here's the verdict.

Two F's.

One D+.

One C-.

I'm very happy about the C-. But the D+...I'll have to take the class over again because it was a major class and they won't accept anything below a C-. *simmer*

One "F" I knew was coming. Retaking next semester.

But the other "F"...I don't know what to do about that.

This has been officially the WORST semester of my college career.

I'm going to a pity corner for a while...be back later.

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