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Gerard Butler GALS



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A short Story

Once upon a time, about six thirty LA time on Christmas Eve, there was a boy and he's just come out of the shower and he doesn‘t know it yet, but he‘s just about to experience a true, Christmas miracle!

He sits down on the side of the bed and picks up a script lying on the nightstand, then casually leafs through it. He's been trying to get a chance to look it over the last few days but it's been pretty hectic. So, he'll just have to try to get to it while he’s on the plane later tonight instead of sleeping. Sleep is overrated anyway.

He glances down at his little dog, sitting quietly on her bed nearby and feels a tiny pang of jealousy at her carefree life, so he asks her in a very serious tone, "How come you haven't read through this thing for me and given your opinion?" She cocks her cute little head to one side as he tosses the script back down on the bed. He walks over to the window to look out at the view. He's tall and well built, muscular and very masculine, and moves quite gracefully for a man his size.

He reflects back over the past year and thinks about the upcoming new one. It’s been quite a journey and it all seems to be falling in to place at more of a breakneck speed now but that's OK. He feels happy, although he hopes this next year will be even better but a little slower pace, even though he knows in his heart, it won‘t!

He runs his hand across his bare stomach and then looks down at it. Maybe he needs to lay off the Holiday goodies for a while!

The sun has set now in the California sky and the lights are coming up, twinkling everywhere. There seems to be more of them than usual and he sees a palm tree decorated in Christmas lights! Someone’s rooftop has the words, “Feliz Navidad” spelled out all green lights!

There's one last party to attend and make the rounds tonight before heading out and catching the red eye to New York City. No palm trees for him at Christmas this year! Besides, he's got a few gifts to give there and, of course, there’s New Years Eve in Time's Square!

It will be cold and the thought of that make's him secretly wish, at times like this, he had someone's hand to hold, to snuggle close to and keep him warm on these cold, winter nights. But it shouldn’t just be anyone. Sure he could find a warm body at anytime amongst the always willing females that surround him constantly, but it’s not the same when it isn’t that someone special.

There seems to be so many women these days with their own agendas and loose morals and just because they look good on the outside, doesn‘t mean they‘re beautiful on the inside. So right now he prefers the latter.. No time to be serious. Maybe one day he’ll have the time or he'll meet someone this Holiday, perhaps, either under the mistletoe or under the ball on New Year's Eve! He always keeps his eyes open to the possibilities. She’s out there somewhere, probably right under his nose. He glances back down at the little dog and smiles.

"You're comin' with me then aren't you?"

She perks up, as if she understood every word he asked her, and runs out of the room.

He sadly watches the little dog scamper away and calls out after her, "Well, that’s a fine thing when a guy can't even get his dog to keep him warm, especially on the holidays!"

Feeling a bit dejected, he walks in to the closet and surveys the situation in regards to the more pressing issue at the moment, what to wear tonight! Not much to pick from really, well, that‘s clean anyway. He wonders "who does the laundry around here?" He remembers the last conversation he had with his PA the other day about this very thing and it was determined that when in a bind, such as this one, there is an almost brand new washer and dryer and they even have their own room and they have all the modern conveniences. And even though those machines can be rather intimidating with all their buttons and buzzers, they are very self explanatory in their operation. However, he shutters as he recalls the last time he did a wash himself and everything came out pink!

So he decides to leave that as a backup plan for now and continues to rifle through a few things tossed on the floor. He then selects one of the shirts in the pile and gives it the old tried and true “sniff test“.

"Whoa!" He tosses it back down. Then locates another shirt and upon picking it up, notices a small, gossamer, red laced item under it. It looks much like an eye patch. He carefully picks it up to give it a closer examination as he thinks back to the costume party a few weeks ago. Wasn’t there a “devil” needing a ride home or was it a "pirate"!

After finally realizing that it's not an eye patch, he replies to himself, "Oh now I remember this and in that regard, that would make this my “lucky shirt!" He lets the skimpy piece of female undergarment drop back to the floor. He puts on the shirt and buttons it up, and just as he’s walking out of the closet, one of them pops off just at the midriff.

"Bloody hell!” he shouts. “I really do need to get back in the gym!"

He wonders what he's going to do now! His two cleanest dirty shirts, the one smelling like the inside of an outhouse and the other one now missing a button, were his last options! Does he even possess a needle and thread to repair it? He wonders if anyone ever super glued a button on?

He's now coming to the stark realization that he’s in real trouble and has absolutely nothing to wear tonight and at this point, he hasn‘t even checked the underwear drawer! Maybe this is an omen that he should just stay home and curl up with a good script and do a load of laundry? Too bad this wasn’t going to be a costume party! That “phantom” suit just came back from the cleaners this morning!

Then, just at that moment, the door bell rings and his little dog starts barking in her most ferocious sounding snarl! That can only mean one thing! He grabs a towel and wraps it around him. By the time he reaches the front door and puts one eye to the peephole, he sees the back of the postman walking away. He opens the door and a package falls in. Could this be what he thinks it is? He picks it up and sees that the return address is from Scotland! “Yes!“

Excitedly, he begins tearing away at the brown outer wrapping until he gets to the colorful Christmas paper underneath. The card on the box says, "To My Wonderful Son, Merry Christmas, with all my love, Mum".

He smiles and continues to rip at the paper like a child on Christmas morning until he gets down to the box. Finally, he opens it and there, between the pieces of folded tissue, is a lovely new shirt! Such synchronicity! He's needing a clean shirt and suddenly, one appears! It was as if she knew! A guy can always count on his Mum in a pinch!

Quickly he slips it on and although it fits maybe just a wee bit big, he‘s overjoyed! . He smiles to himself thinking, “Just like a Mum! She still thinks she has to buy clothes that you can grow in to! Or, on second thought, perhaps she determined that after all of that meat pie and Alaskan bake consumed while back at home, it might be wise to send a size larger! Now, if I could only find a pair of pants!”

He passes a mirror and stops to admire himself with some discernment.

"Eat your heart out, Brad Pitt!"

Pleased with the surprise gift, he sets off to find those pants and finish dressing for the evening, when just before he can, the doorbell rings yet again. Fully aware that he’s still dressed only in a shirt and a towel, he goes back to the peephole and recognizes the next door neighbor standing there.

Opening the door up just enough to look around at the smiling neighbor, he notices he’s holding what looks like, yes, a pair of jeans!

And before he can even say one word of greeting, the neighbor announces, “Found these in my Mimosa tree, big guy, you know the one in throwing distance from your bedroom balcony?” The neighbor winks in understanding. “Merry Christmas, neighbor, and a Happy New Year!”

The neighbor hands him the neatly folded Versace jeans and saunters away, obviously trying to avoid an awkward moment.

He looks down at the pants in his hands in utter amazement! He had wondered where he'd put these! Then he turned to his little dog who‘d been looking on and replied, choking back a tear;

“See there, girl, it’s truly a miracle! Christmas is such a mysterious and magical time of year!”

May you get all you wish for, hope for and at the very least all that you need, this Christmas.

Happy Holidays and Have a Great New Year!


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