GBPhanatic Posted January 13, 2010 Report Share Posted January 13, 2010 Well since there isn't much going on around here right now, I thought this was a good time to tell a story about one of my beloved dogs. He's not really very "lovable" but I love him anyway but today, I wanted to feed him to the cats! First of all, his name is Cricket and he's a fourteen year old plus Rat Terrier. My vet calls him a "Rat Terror" and justifiably so. He rules everyone and everything from the horses right down to the tiniest creatures. It's his way...or it's his way, if you get the picture. So among Crickets glowing attributes are his ability to stick close enough to you as you walk through the house so that he follows you in to every room every minute of the day but delays on following you back out again and if you leave him there and he can't get out, he has the most annoying, teeth jarring yip on the planet and you WILL go and let him out immediately. Also, one the reasons he sticks so close is not out of love, so Cesar Milan claims, but more that he's keeping an eye on you. He doesn't see me as the "pack leader" but just another one of HIS pack and where you go, he will stick with you to make sure you dare not leave. I have to concede here that he is the only dog of my entire pack that I cannot force in to submission. The last time I tried to instill a sense of pecking order, I was met with not just his classic trademark growl but a quick and efficient "clamp down" on my upper, inner thigh. I often reflect back to that day as to the luck of just sustaining a bruise in the shape of teeth but had I been a male and carrying an addition package in that area, it might have been a much different story. Well, today once again, he got the last laugh. Just as I had felt I had gotten the upper hand, out witted him with my human ability to "outsmart the little dog", he showed me that he's still a force to be reckoned with. I made my lunch and as I did so, he stood beneath me at my side, waiting patiently. I had made up my mind that this meal, I wanted to eat in peace and not be disturbed or harrassed for any of it. So, I started walking with my food in hand. He saw this and proceeded to walk with me. I stopped at the door to my office and opened it as if to go inside with my food, as I occasionally do eat in there. Well, my plan worked like a charm. He darted in to the room and I shut the door behind him. Now he is looking at me through the glass panes and I, at him. I couldn't resist rubbing it in a bit so I cackled at him and stuck out my tongue and did a bit of a victory dance all while the little bugger watched in dismay. Then, I walked off to find a place to have my lunch in doggless bliss for a change, remarking to myself at how smart I was and that when the chips were down, no canine on the planet could beat me. After dining, I went back to the office and he still stood glaring out at me. I looked in at him and popped the last of my sandwich in my mouth and savored it openly in front of him. I then chanted "That's right, little man, I ate it all without having to give you one, solitary bite, na, na, na, na, ne, na." I then opened the door and he strode out, passing me and going on his way as if I had done nothing in my efforts to one up him. So be it! I walked in to my office and sat down at my computer. Now I must explain a bit about the configuration of this room. It's not a huge room but is located in the front of the house, with a huge window, with a fan shaped transom window and a high ceiling and since the house faces north west, this room can get quite cold and I had invested a few years ago, in a very nice, high end, space heater with thermostat control, auto turnoff, etc. I depend on it in the winter to take the edge off in there. As I sat at my computer, I heard the heater gently and quietly rev up and that meant that momentarily, my cold feet would feel the warth and comfort of the heat it provided. It did just that but a long with it came the most obnoxious, eye watering, nasal searing, gastly odor I had ever experienced (and I've experienced many)! I stood up and surveyed the room. What was this odor and where was it coming from? Then, following the scent downward, I figured it out in an instant. My ever faithful, beloved little heater was sitting in a little puddle of wet.......DOG URINE! Not only had the little crap peed on my heater, but he must have emptied the entire contents of his bladder out because all down the side and front of it trailed the golden liquid and now, it was roasting nicely and filling the room with such an aroma that I clasped my hand over my mouth and nose! Quickly, I hit the OFF button and picked the appliance up. I zapped the wet spot on the floor and then took to the heater with an appliance cleaner, cleaning out each pore and crevice, praying that it only sustained a superficial strike! But to add insult to injury, as I painstakingly worked to clean up the heater, I happened to glance over to the door and spy the small, bugged eyed gaze of the gulprit staring back at me through the glass with such a look on his face that it could only have said one thing, if he had been able to speak, that is.... GOTCHA! Delene Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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