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I'm hoping I'm putting this in the proper place. I have a suggestion.

I was wondering our posts on the forum were not "invisible" to everyone but members? I think it is great for visitors to navigate other parts of the site such as the gallery, etc. but I was thinking that maybe our personal postings should be unavailable to the general public. Just a thought.

This would serve several purposes maybe. One would be that outside nonfans of Gerry could not read our personal comments, stories and poems and then go talk about it on other sites that are maybe havens for not so fanfriendly people, if you know what I mean. And the other would be if someone was interested enough to want to read our comments, get the lastest Gerry news and join in the conversation, they have to register to be a member. Another would also make it a safer place for people to post their stories, poems, etc., without fear of someone using or copying their work as it would be viewed only by members. I know that doesn't assure that would not happen but it would sure limit the number of eyes that see it!

Right now, if I'm understanding it, anyone who just wants to lurk, get the latest information and news about Gerry and read our comments, stories, etc., can do so without joining. The only thing they can't do is post a comment, am I right?

I've talked to a few members who say they never post anything or join in because they don't feel comfortable about doing so for the whole world to see. This might also give them the opportunity to join in more if they felt only members are viewing what they write.

I think knowing what you post is available for anyone to see inhibits some people and lately it is affecting my participation in contributing creatively as well.

Just a thought. Hope this made sense.

Thanks for you consideration.

Delene

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I'm hoping I'm putting this in the proper place. I have a suggestion.

I was wondering our posts on the forum were not "invisible" to everyone but members? I think it is great for visitors to navigate other parts of the site such as the gallery, etc. but I was thinking that maybe our personal postings should be unavailable to the general public. Just a thought.

This would serve several purposes maybe. One would be that outside nonfans of Gerry could not read our personal comments, stories and poems and then go talk about it on other sites that are maybe havens for not so fanfriendly people, if you know what I mean. And the other would be if someone was interested enough to want to read our comments, get the lastest Gerry news and join in the conversation, they have to register to be a member. Another would also make it a safer place for people to post their stories, poems, etc., without fear of someone using or copying their work as it would be viewed only by members. I know that doesn't assure that would not happen but it would sure limit the number of eyes that see it!

Right now, if I'm understanding it, anyone who just wants to lurk, get the latest information and news about Gerry and read our comments, stories, etc., can do so without joining. The only thing they can't do is post a comment, am I right?

I've talked to a few members who say they never post anything or join in because they don't feel comfortable about doing so for the whole world to see. This might also give them the opportunity to join in more if they felt only members are viewing what they write.

I think knowing what you post is available for anyone to see inhibits some people and lately it is affecting my participation in contributing creatively as well.

Just a thought. Hope this made sense.

Thanks for you consideration.

Delene

This post been brought to Dr. Em's attention and will likely go to the ModSquad for further discussion.

:thankyou: for your post!

Spot

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Thank you! That was fast!

Delene :wave:

Our MODS and ADMINS work as fast as they can ~ Never fail to impress! :claphands:

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I appreciate your suggestion, however, after much discussion, we have no plans to change anything in regards to posting for the following reasons:

1. I personally have no problem whatsoever with non-members frequenting the site, in fact, I invite it! Just because someone isn't a member, it certainly doesn't make them less of a fan of Mr. Butler and as such are just as deserving of the information we have gleaned.

2. As far as members feeling more inhibited by the fact that others may see their posts, I can understand, but I don't personally see that as a negative, but rather a way of policing yourself.

If you'd like to post personal information and don't want it out there for the general public, I encourage you to obtain over-18 access by contacting a Moderator as this area IS protected from non-members...HOWEVER, please remember, that even though it's a member only forum, that doesn't mean that someone can't sign up and become a member and like all good trolls, use that information to harm you somehow. If you are thin-skinned, I strongly encourage you to either be mindful of your posts or get thicker skin! There will always be those who get their sick jollies from cutting others down. In their sick and twisted minds, by making fun of you, they think it makes them "better" than you. Trust me, getting thicker skin IS a good option coupled with good ol' common sense and discretion.

3. As for creative issues, I think I'll just have to be blunt here, if it's on the net, you have to EXPECT that it's free for anyone to do what they will with it. That's just the way of the net! Does it make it right? No, but you just have to expect that someone may use your schtuff and call it theirs. If you don't like that, then don't post your poems, stories, ideas, siggies, etc.

If you have written a poem or story that is very meaningful to you, understand again, that there are rude people who may try and take what is important to you and twist it into something ugly. Some people are just so unhappy and they can't find anything productive to do, so they find some sort of perverted joy by making fun of others.

Finally, we, the Admins. and Mods. of GBGALS feel that we have created a wonderful community for our membership and we do what we can to protect our members, but in the end, it's up to each individual member to be responsible for what they say and the material they post and therefore, put 'out there' for public consumption on the Net.

:hugs:

Dayna

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I agree with Dayna completely.

I adore Gerry and don't give a flip what

anyone else thinks of me for it. He is

such a talented and handsome man that

he inspires admiration and the kind of love

we all feel for him. I am not ashamed of

my regard for this wonderful man.

Second, one of the main reason I joined this

site was because I read some of the member's

post and was convinced that everyone here

felt the same way that I do about Gerry, and that

this is a place I would NOT be criticized for my

feelings and love for him. I feel confident that

my comments here will be understood and most

of the time appreciated by others who feel the

same way I do.

Third, we are all different. We think and feel things

with different levels of enthusiasm and ferver. I

know I am a Pisces and feel things a lot stronger

and a lot deeper than some other people, but here,

one of very few places in the world, I feel safe to

confide to the other members or even perhaps

someone who has just experienced Gerry for the

first time.

I hope that no one stops doing what they are doing

here. I have read some of the most beautiful poetry

and stories here that I have ever heard. You have to

realize that the only way to stop someone else from

stealing your gifts is to patent them or keep them inside,

and I hope you never stop sharing your talent. That would

be heartbreaking.

The novels I have read as a result of interest and inspiration

from Gerry are amazing. All of these talented people should

be sharing their gifts with the rest of the world.

I love all of you here, and appreciate all of the talent that

flows through this site.

Love him absolutely,

Sandy

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I lurked here at GALS for months before I joined. I discovered the members here were warm and funny and they loved Gerry without reservation. The entire site was just the kind of friendly "home" I'd been looking for. Had I not been able to read posts, I would never have joined. Now GALS is a HUGE part of my life, I have made lasting friendships and my days are full! I know others have had the same experience. I'm thrilled we have open forums here and hope that never changes!

Suzie

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With all due respect, I believe part of my reasons for this suggestion were misunderstood. My main concern was the negativity and seeming lack of support that seems to be allowed on the site by members being in full view of anyone who wants to see it, whether they are anti-Gerry or just individuals who might WANT to join the site but decided NOT to because of it. My intention was not to cramp anyone's style as far as their expression for their love of Gerry, far from it.

The recent discussions of Gerry's movie are case in point. I still feel that it is in poor taste to discuss your negative feelings about something that Gerry has done, creatively or privately on a fan support site. This does not mean we are not entitled to disagree with something, but stating that you are "embarrassed" for Gerry, "abhoring" a film he has done, etc., on his fan site seems extreme. There's a difference between being tactful and tacky. This seems to go against the rules that take in to consideration what is acceptable for Gerry or his family and friends to view. I don't think Gerry or any of his people would want to come to his site and after being bombarded by negative reviews on the outside, find his own fans just as disenchanted. That seems like it could be a real downer. And being sensitive to things like this is not being "thinned skinned". All that seems counterproductive, but I appreciate that I am not the one making the rules and if this is something that is OK, so be it.

As far as people's creative abilities being exploited on the site, that is truly their choice to decide whether or not they want their "art" to be out there and have the graciousness to share it. Personally, I have not had any problem with mine, so far, but I just thought that it was an added bonus for the creative to feel more at ease about sharing it if it was only visible in a more intimate environment to members, other than the over 18, which by the way, I do have access to.

It also saddens me and is disappointing to see that our stories, poems, drawings and graphics, etc., are considered to be just "schtuff". These things are from the heart and soul of their creators, whether they are about Gerry, making reference to Gerry or just putting our feelings out there. It's too bad that those who perhaps do not possess the creative gene, cannot appreciate those of us who do. That is something I failed to take in to consideration but consider me "enlightened".

1. I personally have no problem whatsoever with non-members frequenting the site, in fact, I invite it! Just because someone isn't a member, it certainly doesn't make them less of a fan of Mr. Butler and as such are just as deserving of the information we have gleaned.

I was not suggesting that anyone, nonmember or "troll" be limited to the site, just the personal postings of the members. Anyone can get all the information they need about Gerry here or a dozen other places on the internet. This isn't the only place. However, being able to view the comments from the members, some of which continually seem disappointed in Gerry's work but still remain a fan for some strange reason, some that seem to feel they "own" Gerry, know his personal whereabouts each minute of the day and continually correct or critisize other posters for their "lack of knowledge" of all things Gerry, can make the site appear less then what it was intended and unfriendly. If it is the consensus, then, of the moderating staff that these kinds of displays are acceptable, then far be it for me to argue.

The main reasoning for my suggestion was so that "fans" could be able to express their disappointments, their disapproval, their abhorrence and their negative view points, their love, adoration, possessiveness or obsession without the entire world seeing it and perhaps for those who wanted to voice their opinions, express their creative side or join in the conversations, there would be further incentive for them to become a member, which I thought of benefit to the site. Seems I was wrong on all counts and it's not that big of a deal.

Delene

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The main reasoning for my suggestion was so that "fans" could be able to express their disappointments, their disapproval, their abhorrence and their negative view points, their love, adoration, possessiveness or obsession without the entire world seeing it and perhaps for those who wanted to voice their opinions, express their creative side or join in the conversations, there would be further incentive for them to become a member, which I thought of benefit to the site.

Delene

With all due respect, I second that. I believe it would be beneficial to the site if there was a way to separate personal posts from news and general informative stuff that could be available to all.

Of course I respect the decision of the admins but I thought it would be fair for Delene to know that she's not alone.

Theresa

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:wave: Delene,

I still feel that it is in poor taste to discuss your negative feelings about something that Gerry has done, creatively or privately on a fan support site.

I don't believe that any negative discussion on Gerry's private life is a factor here since it's not allowed. Gerry's movies however are a different story and while I personally find something to love in all of his movies (if it's only the man himself) I don't feel that a "fan" who doesn't like one or two of his films is being a disloyal fan. I would like to think that if Gerry did read this forum that he would see a variety of individuals who share in their support of him and his career but have different tastes and preferences when it comes to his work. He may even appreciate the honesty expressed.

some that seem to feel they "own" Gerry, know his personal whereabouts each minute of the day and continually correct or critisize other posters for their "lack of knowledge" of all things Gerry, can make the site appear less then what it was intended and unfriendly.

I'm at a loss here because in all the years I've been on this site I have never experienced any of this Delene and I'm sorry that you have had that experience. Anyone here or on any FANsite that gives the impression that the "own" Gerry in my humble opinion is seriously delusional.

I am a big fan of your poetry and I'm so glad to hear that you will continue to share your wonderful talent with us sweetie.

hugs,

Sue

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:wave: Delene,

I still feel that it is in poor taste to discuss your negative feelings about something that Gerry has done, creatively or privately on a fan support site.

I don't believe that any negative discussion on Gerry's private life is a factor here since it's not allowed. Gerry's movies however are a different story and while I personally find something to love in all of his movies (if it's only the man himself) I don't feel that a "fan" who doesn't like one or two of his films is being a disloyal fan. I would like to think that if Gerry did read this forum that he would see a variety of individuals who share in their support of him and his career but have different tastes and preferences when it comes to his work. He may even appreciate the honesty expressed.

some that seem to feel they "own" Gerry, know his personal whereabouts each minute of the day and continually correct or critisize other posters for their "lack of knowledge" of all things Gerry, can make the site appear less then what it was intended and unfriendly.

I'm at a loss here because in all the years I've been on this site I have never experienced any of this Delene and I'm sorry that you have had that experience. Anyone here or on any FANsite that gives the impression that the "own" Gerry in my humble opinion is seriously delusional.

I am a big fan of your poetry and I'm so glad to hear that you will continue to share your wonderful talent with us sweetie.

hugs,

Sue

Sue, what a sweet lady you are and always have been! I appreciate your positive input and your tact more than you know. But I must say that I think I am still being miscontrued in my meaning. I DO believe it is the right of every fan of Gerry's to NOT be a fan of everything he does, that's not my point and voicing it on this site can be done in a downplayed way that is still supportive. Some even bring negative remarks or suggestions of them back to the site, things that Gerry himself tries to avoid! What good is it then to reinstate the negative on a fan support site? I guess I'm the one who's delusional maybe.

Let me give an example. A member goes to JJ and reads negative posts or views negative reviews, come back to this site and mentions it, "you should see all the horrible bad things they are saying about Gerry over there" kind of thing, even when they are showing their disapproval of it! Say a potential new fan/member sees Gerry for the first time and clicks on this site to find out more wonderful information about Gerry and reads this here then is compelled to go back to the site with the negative remarks are or they just read where we are not happy with his movie ourselves or that we witnessed a mass exodus in the theatre! What do you suppose they will think?

If we are suppose to be a fan site, supporting his career and his life, why bring the dirt in and rehash it? Why go on about how much you did not like a movie he did here on the site? We have a right as the movie going public to not like something and go ahead and say it wasn't your "cup of tea" or you think the script could have been better written, that kind of thing, but leave it at that. He's the professional and he knows more what's going on then we do. We have to trust that he knows what he's doing, or at least act like we do, or we're not being a true fan and becoming more of just another critic. Let his manager, agents or mother box his ears about stuff. Sure he'll make mistakes and misjudgements, we all do, that's what makes us human, but when you care about someone, you try not to make too big a deal out of any misfirings and go forward. You don't see the Laker girls sit down on the sidelines and boo if the team is behind do you? Keep on cheering and let the coach do the betching. That's my concern but obviously it's not that big of a thing here. If you can't stop it, my only suggestion was to make it less visible to the general public, that's all and I just mentioned some sideline benefits that could occur. Not a big deal.

As I said before, there's a difference in being "tactful" rather than just plain "tacky". But it's not my call. Just an observation.

As far as the "ownership" problems I mentioned, we are in agreement of that being bourne of delusion. I'm glad you were the one who mentioned it though. Sometimes I think it's more out of finding fault with an individual then an individual comment, but I can handle it. Unfortunately, I have talked to many who are frankly hurt by it and it discourages them from participation on the site. In other words, you may not have experienced it because it is more directed to a person for whatever reason.

Frannie inspired a lot of my thought process the other day when she voiced some of her concerns and her desire to perhaps stay away from the site for a while. She is a much loved and much appreciated member on this site and for her to feel that disillusioned is scary. I think it's a shame when you "join" something and just feel like an outsider. In that regard, why bother? Just lurk around rather than participate! I totally relate to what she's saying, though. Although making the posts invisible to the general public would not solve this problem, I think I understand her disappointment where the site may be heading and she's been here a lot longer then I have and has seen it's tranformation more too.

The membership of any organization or community will be pushed to evolve over time and it's always the nature of that evolvement for those who are steeped in doing things the old way to feel somewhat threatened as newer ideas, voices and ways of doing things come along. Sometimes things have to change to meet the demands of potential evolution. Change is good sometimes and it promotes growth and growth is good or else we become stagnant.

When the site was created a few years back with just a few members for an actor who was a relative unknown but up and coming, it was more intimate and close knit. I can understand that, but as Gerry's popularity grows, so does his following. Sometimes certain aspects have to be tweeked to accommodate that.

Thank you for enjoying my poetry, Sue. It's been a pleasure to bring some element of entertainment to those who know how to appreciate it for what it was intended.

Hugs, Delene

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I agree with Dayna completely.

I adore Gerry and don't give a flip what

anyone else thinks of me for it. He is

such a talented and handsome man that

he inspires admiration and the kind of love

we all feel for him. I am not ashamed of

my regard for this wonderful man.

Second, one of the main reason I joined this

site was because I read some of the member's

post and was convinced that everyone here

felt the same way that I do about Gerry, and that

this is a place I would NOT be criticized for my

feelings and love for him. I feel confident that

my comments here will be understood and most

of the time appreciated by others who feel the

same way I do.

Third, we are all different. We think and feel things

with different levels of enthusiasm and ferver. I

know I am a Pisces and feel things a lot stronger

and a lot deeper than some other people, but here,

one of very few places in the world, I feel safe to

confide to the other members or even perhaps

someone who has just experienced Gerry for the

first time.

I hope that no one stops doing what they are doing

here. I have read some of the most beautiful poetry

and stories here that I have ever heard. You have to

realize that the only way to stop someone else from

stealing your gifts is to patent them or keep them inside,

and I hope you never stop sharing your talent. That would

be heartbreaking.

The novels I have read as a result of interest and inspiration

from Gerry are amazing. All of these talented people should

be sharing their gifts with the rest of the world.

I love all of you here, and appreciate all of the talent that

flows through this site.

Love him absolutely,

Sandy

Just wanted to say that I love this post! Here's to you, San! :rose:

With all due respect, I believe part of my reasons for this suggestion were misunderstood. My main concern was the negativity and seeming lack of support that seems to be allowed on the site by members being in full view of anyone who wants to see it, whether they are anti-Gerry or just individuals who might WANT to join the site but decided NOT to because of it. My intention was not to cramp anyone's style as far as their expression for their love of Gerry, far from it.

"Those who have nothing to hide, hide nothing." I post the following as a member of this site and not as a mod: Contrary to your point, it is my position that this "openness" is the very thing that allows lurkers to see, first hand, that we are NOT the "cookie cutter, zealot, zombie fans" of "Midas Gerry." As a passionate, excited, often extreme fanbase, we are CONSTANTLY being painted in the foregoing negative light. By allowing the varying opinions to be viewed by anyone proves that we are, in fact, a diverse, opinionated, passionate group that tolerates differing views as it relates to Gerry, both personally and professionally.

We know that our site is viewed by not only people representing Gerry, but by numerous movie houses (ie Sony, WB, Lionsgate, etc.) Gerry has consistently supported us in Vegas and has stated on numerous occasions that he "loves [our] site." He KNOWS who and what we are - AS WE ARE. Since I know from experience that he will have someone contact us when there is something on the site that he does not appreciate, I'm CONFIDENT that if our honesty and diversity were problematic to him, he would let us know one way or another ... even if it was to make a "comment in jest" just to get his point across (as he so often does).

...The recent discussions of Gerry's movie are case in point. I still feel that it is in poor taste to discuss your negative feelings about something that Gerry has done, creatively or privately on a fan support site. This does not mean we are not entitled to disagree with something, but stating that you are "embarrassed" for Gerry, "abhoring" a film he has done, etc., on his fan site seems extreme. There's a difference between being tactful and tacky. This seems to go against the rules that take in to consideration what is acceptable for Gerry or his family and friends to view. I don't think Gerry or any of his people would want to come to his site and after being bombarded by negative reviews on the outside, find his own fans just as disenchanted. That seems like it could be a real downer. And being sensitive to things like this is not being "thinned skinned". All that seems counterproductive, but I appreciate that I am not the one making the rules and if this is something that is OK, so be it.

I appreciate that YOU feel this is in poor taste. However, for the reasons stated above, I respectfully disagree. There is a difference between tactful and tacky, but sometimes the distinction is very subjective. As a moderator, tacky isn't the issue, "respectful" is the issue. For example:

ACCEPTABLE: "I abhor, loathe and otherwise detest P.S. I love you, but respect that you like it. Different strokes for different folks..."

UNACCEPTABLE: "P.S. I love you is a horrible waste of celluloid and anyone that likes this crap is a dumbass."

The main reasoning for my suggestion was so that "fans" could be able to express their disappointments, their disapproval, their abhorrence and their negative view points, their love, adoration, possessiveness or obsession without the entire world seeing it...

There are numerous places on this site for people to do this, whether it's in the Over 18 section or in threads marked "protected." If you're over 18 and don't have access to this area of the site, but would like to, please see our Over 18 Guidelines. If you meet the criteria, contact a mod! If you see a "protected thread," contact a mod for the password so that you can see if you'd like to participate. Of course, you can always approach the MS about a thread you'd like to start and discuss the need for adding a password ...

...some that seem to feel they "own" Gerry, know his personal whereabouts each minute of the day and continually correct or critisize other posters for their "lack of knowledge" of all things Gerry, can make the site appear less then what it was intended and unfriendly.

GIIIIIRRRRRRRRRLLLLLLL, PREACH IT!! This aspect of the board is ABSOLUTELY EXHAUSTING!

Posted Image ... :sarcasm:

ETA: I just read Delene's post which was put up while I was composing. I agree wholeheartedly about bringing negative stuff from "other sites" to ours. Several of us affectionately refer to that act as "tracking crap on the carpet." However, to simply state, "You should see what they're saying 'over there'..." does not violate our guidelines. As you said, it's out there. If someone is inclined to search out the negative after being warned of it, we can't do much about that. Conversely, an example of an unacceptable post regarding another site would be, "Man, you should see what they're saying over there. They all think Gerry's a dumbass and can't do anything right. They're eating their young and calling Gerry a jerk and ripping on this poor woman, [insert name here], that's clearly new to his world. Man, is she a dumbass..." Please remember that if you see something you believe clearly violates our guidelines, there IS a "report" button for members to use. When used correctly, this alerts the MS to potential "situations."

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awww shucks Delene, thanks sweetie...but you haven't seen me when my "irish" gets us...lol

Let me give an example. A member goes to JJ and reads negative posts or views negative reviews, come back to this site and mentions it, "you should see all the horrible bad things they are saying about Gerry over there" kind of thing, even when they are showing their disapproval of it!

I really think that the mods and admins try to curtail this as much as is humanly possible. I know many times I've seen posts where the mods have reminded posters to leave the negativity at the other sites. That being said, I hate to think that some new fan of Gerry's would or could be swayed by someone else's feelings about a given movie. Personally, I go to Just Jared...snag the beautiful pics and never read the comments. And some of the other boards I know that are out there....well, I just stay away from them because they tend to get my "irish" REALLY up.

As I said before, there's a difference in being "tactful" rather than just plain "tacky".

I agree...but Delene, that's our natures. I know I just have that kind of make up. It was the way I was raised. But hon, not everyone is like that and this is a board open to everyone who wants to join (unless of course it becomes obvious that the true motive in joining is NOT because they are a fan of Gerry's but for some other motive). I know that I have a dry sense of humor and that sometimes I post things in fun that someone may take the wrong way. That's the nature of the beast and just comes with belonging to a community. I belonged to another site that was constantly critiquing everything posted and removing posts with no explanation or just because the owner didn't like what was said. I felt like I joined a community that belonged behind the iron curtain....lol. Needless to say I didn't stay long.

Frannie inspired a lot of my thought process the other day when she voiced some of her concerns and her desire to perhaps stay away from the site for a while. She is a much loved and much appreciated member on this site and for her to feel that disillusioned is scary. I think it's a shame when you "join" something and just feel like an outsider. In that regard, why bother? Just lurk around rather than participate! I totally relate to what she's saying, though. Although making the posts invisible to the general public would not solve this problem, I think I understand her disappointment where the site may be heading and she's been here a lot longer then I have and has seen it's tranformation more too.

Delene, I think you know, but maybe you don't....Frannie is not just one of my galfriends, she's my mentor, teacher, girlfriend and sister of the heart. She, along with a few other of my bestest girlfriends on GALS, helped get me through the saddest period of my life when I was dealing with my hubby's illness and death. She is going through so much personally right now and I know that she loves GALS. I've talked to her since that post and she asked me to post (which I did) that she just needed a breather and would be back. She has even posted herself since than that she is still away from home but how much she misses gals.

I guess personally, I think this kind of dialog, along with many other pro and con types of dialog that goes on at GALS and is open for anyone and everyone to read, is a good thing. It allows those "guests" who are thinking about joining GALS to see that this board is made up of some many different people who bring something different to the table and that there is a place for everyone who wants to participate. I just know that it did for me.

Hugs sweetie, and don't stop writing your beautiful poetry....you give us siggy makers the words for our pictures!!!

love,

Sue

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"Those who have nothing to hide, hide nothing." I post the following as a member of this site and not as a mod: Contrary to your point, it is my position that this "openness" is the very thing that allows lurkers to see, first hand, that we are NOT the "cookie cutter, zealot, zombie fans" of "Midas Gerry." As a passionate, excited, often extreme fanbase, we are CONSTANTLY being painted in the foregoing negative light. By allowing the varying opinions to be viewed by anyone proves that we are, in fact, a diverse, opinionated, passionate group that tolerates differing views as it relates to Gerry, both personally and professionally.

We know that our site is viewed by not only people representing Gerry, but by numerous movie houses (ie Sony, WB, Lionsgate, etc.) Gerry has consistently supported us in Vegas and has stated on numerous occasions that he "loves [our] site." He KNOWS who and what we are - AS WE ARE. Since I know from experience that he will have someone contact us when there is something on the site that he does not appreciate, I'm CONFIDENT that if our honesty and diversity were problematic to him, he would let us know one way or another ... even if it was to make a "comment in jest" just to get his point across (as he so often does).

Love this Holly!

Also as a fan and not a Mod, I lurked here for a long time. The reason I joined the site was because of what I saw.

An honest open format open for all and welcoming all.

Cheryl

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I belong to several internet fan groups, some are devoted to Gerry, others are for other entertainers whom I admire and whose careers I follow. Ok, I admit to drooling over photos as well.....clears throat....but back to my point...in each case I lurked around on the forum for a while to get a feel for the group before joining. There are some that after lurking a while I decided not to join. Whenever I encountered a group where the forum was members only, I moved on and didn't join. I didn't want to join a group "site unseen" if you will. ;)

Edited by Lady Elissa

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You have to

realize that the only way to stop someone else from

stealing your gifts is to patent them or keep them inside,

and I hope you never stop sharing your talent

This does not always stop plagiarism but merely makes it easier for you to sue someone for it. I am aware of copyright law. I also know that when you post something on the internet, it is considered a published work and your name is attached to it as owner, however, someone can still copy or steal it and you can still fight it, it's just easier if it was legally copyrighted.

But this was not the reason for my suggestion.

"Those who have nothing to hide, hide nothing." I post the following as a member of this site and not as a mod: Contrary to your point, it is my position that this "openness" is the very thing that allows lurkers to see, first hand, that we are NOT the "cookie cutter, zealot, zombie fans" of "Midas Gerry." As a passionate, excited, often extreme fanbase, we are CONSTANTLY being painted in the foregoing negative light. By allowing the varying opinions to be viewed by anyone proves that we are, in fact, a diverse, opinionated, passionate group that tolerates differing views as it relates to Gerry, both personally and professionally

.

Why do we have to "prove" anything to people like that? The only thing we are supposed to do is support Gerry and set a good example as his fans. Do you not think that he is somewhat judged by our words and behavior sometimes? Showing that we can be fair weather fans or fickle, to me, does not prove anything and I don't see that diffusing the situation. If they can't SEE it, they can't say anything at all. My concern, first of all, is not just with the nay sayers and trolls, it's more for the public at large and is not for what they think of us and our fandom personally as much as how that reflects on him.

Gerry has consistently supported us in Vegas and has stated on numerous occasions that he "loves [our] site." He KNOWS who and what we are - AS WE ARE. Since I know from experience that he will have someone contact us when there is something on the site that he does not appreciate, I'm CONFIDENT that if our honesty and diversity were problematic to him, he would let us know one way or another ... even if it was to make a "comment in jest" just to get his point across (as he so often does).

When you are referring to him making "comments in jest", I take it you mean during interviews and things of that nature? Are you eluding that he is making those for our benefit in response to things we've said? I had no idea! Does he do that really? But the fact that you say that he would contact us when there is something that he doesn't appreciate, I would more believe that in his busy life, he doesn't have the time or the inclination to do that himself, not now, and rather has people in his employe that handle "site watching" for him. And if he did so, then why would he not contact us for the good stuff and not just anything untoward? How happy do you think it would make us if the announcement was made one day that Gerry had come on the site and lurked about for fun and he loves our stories and poems and all the graphics and art we do on his behalf? I'm afraid that's a pipe dream or there's something you're not telling me.

He appreciates what we do with charities and by what I've gotten from his comments, appreciates that we are in it primarily to make friends and acquaintenances more then anything else. I think he only knows what he has been told. I would think we are of a low priorty on his "to do" list, but that doesn't mean he doesn't care. I realize that there are "people" that are in contact with the admins when necessary, but I can't believe they "police" the site more then allow us to do that on our own.

And as far as him loving us, of course he does! We're his fans and we love him and we go to a helluva lot of work on his behalf!

I just read Delene's post which was put up while I was composing. I agree wholeheartedly about bringing negative stuff from "other sites" to ours. Several of us affectionately refer to that act as "tracking crap on the carpet." However, to simply state, "You should see what they're saying 'over there'..." does not violate our guidelines.

You are for bringing the negative stuff to the site? Is that what you are saying? I've never heard of the term of "tracking the crap on the carpet" before now. So you have a term for it. Maybe a hidden language only known to GALS would be useful.

As I said before, there's a difference in being "tactful" rather than just plain "tacky".

I agree...but Delene, that's our natures. I know I just have that kind of make up. It was the way I was raised. But hon, not everyone is like that and this is a board open to everyone who wants to join (unless of course it becomes obvious that the true motive in joining is NOT because they are a fan of Gerry's but for some other motive). I know that I have a dry sense of humor and that sometimes I post things in fun that someone may take the wrong way. That's the nature of the beast and just comes with belonging to a community. I belonged to another site that was constantly critiquing everything posted and removing posts with no explanation or just because the owner didn't like what was said. I felt like I joined a community that belonged behind the iron curtain....lol. Needless to say I didn't stay long.

I am not suggesting a censorship, that's a different thing. I merely was suggesting our personal comments not being available to the general public, that's all.

Then as regards being tolerant of different "natures" and the site's openness and the acceptence of that here on the site, an incidence happened to me a while back when I made a joking remark about Gerry and his friends. Someone said something about how he maintained his friendships for so long and always seemed to have the same guys following him around. While the train of thought continued to compliment Gerry and his ability to maintain such long term friendships, which I have no doubt of, I took the opportunity to make a joke, which is my NATURE. Well, honestly, I had never noticed anyone really following him around myself. I don't watch Gerry's every move. It seemed to me Gerry has a wide range of acquaintences and friends. But anyway, I said, "maybe because they use Gerry as a "babe magnet" and take advantage of his cast offs." This is not verbatim of what I said, but it's close enough. This was a remark totally made in jest and one that I felt Gerry himself would think funny and I was attacked and ganged up on! WOW! So how is that being OPEN? Why was that not treated in the spirit it was intended?

I would think people who know me by now would understand what I meant. And not only was I attacked, but it was done publically on the forum rather then handled in a pm, which I would think would be appropriate if I was out of line in any way. Again the other day, I made a remark and one word was pulled out of what I said and I was asked to "clarify" my meaning. What I said in my post was not being critiqued but the use of one little word. I said that there's a "good Gerry and an evil Gerry". In retrospect, I guess I should have said "bad" Gerry, but the word evil got pounced on. That's why I think it's hypocritical to suggest this is an OPEN forum, diverse in every personality, because sometimes I think it's not but maybe more for a few personalities.

I see it for what it is, sometimes, and it's like I said before, it more attacking the individual then the individual comment. Again, I can handle it and pride myself in not being that "thinned skinned".

I've talked to her since that post and she asked me to post (which I did) that she just needed a breather and would be back. She has even posted herself since than that she is still away from home but how much she misses gals.

As regards our dear Frannie, I guess I miscontrued her meaning then. I took it as a departure because she was a bit disappointed in her recent treatment on the site, more so then personal problems. I wish for her all the best and I miss her. But I also remember some of the comments that followed and I know that if Frannie was opening up her heart and wearing it on her sleeve, she was looking for a little reaffirmation from people too that SHE BELONGS! Instead, I noted that several just agreed with her and told that maybe that was the best for her. I don't think that's the kind of response she was hoping for, IMO.

I think by some of the responses I'm getting here that I'm suggesting a censorship of sorts! Not al all! My concern was based more from the availability of comments to be open to the general public that maybe should just be within our community. So Sony and others like this find it beneficial to read that we are not happy with a movie, especially one Gerry is starring in, I would be a little concerned that they might see that as some confirmation that it's Gerry's fault since we are his fans. But that's just me.

I think that the powers that be understand where we are coming from. I also think that everytime we go on and on about how hot he looks beyond how good he is as an actor, they tell him to unbutton his shirt one more notch. "The movie wasn't all that great, but Gerry sure was hot!" They will play on what the fans want and if it's sex symbol they want, sex symbol they shall have and I want Gerry's career to be more than that. I wonder what he thinks everytime someone asks him, "So what do you think of all the women lusting after you on all the fan sites?" Instead of "So when is your next movie coming out and what's it about?" That type of thing. Another good reason for private posting....GUSHING! Getting offers based on showcasing ones sex appeal as the box office draw I would think is not where an actor wants to be. Sex appeal is a fleeting thing, desirability being based on talent lasts a lot longer. I think Gerard Butler is the hotest man walking the planet, :hitit: but I also think he's a fine actor.

There are some that after lurking a while I decided not to join. Whenever I encountered a group where the forum was members only, I moved on and didn't join. I didn't want to join a group "site unseen" if you will.

Maybe some are lurking here and feel the same? There's two sides to every coin. Even if a forum was members only and the site looked good, I think I'd join just out of pure curiosity maybe more than anything else! At least then, if I didn't like it for whatever reason, I just wouldn't come back, but at the very least, I could always "lurk" the forum just to see what the scuttlebutt was.

I have truly appreciated all the fine comments and responses to my request and my reasoning for it and the admins/mod indulgence in my rant. I had no idea it would stir up such controversy. I also want to thank the admins/mods for their patience and their participation in the conversation.

I merely made a suggestion based on what I deemed a tiny tweek to enhance the site and fan experience. I had no idea that it would spur on such a heated debate.

Thanks again and hugs to everyone!

Delene

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Delene ~

Thank you for your perspective. I will try to answer your questions the best I can, though I feel others have already done so.

With all due respect, I believe part of my reasons for this suggestion were misunderstood. My main concern was the negativity and seeming lack of support that seems to be allowed on the site by members being in full view of anyone who wants to see it, whether they are anti-Gerry or just individuals who might WANT to join the site but decided NOT to because of it. My intention was not to cramp anyone's style as far as their expression for their love of Gerry, far from it.

I believe I understood what you were saying, but I just disagree with you. I think that all opinions, as long as they are respectfully presented, are welcome. I don't want a site that is so homogenized that people don't feel free to express their honest opinions. I would say that if someone joins this site, the likelihood of them being fans of Mr. Butler is pretty high and as such, they WANT to support him in his professional endeavors. But...sometimes they just don't like a professional choice he has made (as in a film) or something like unto it and thus, they express that. I don't have a problem with that whatsoever. And if reading member's honest opinions - both good and bad - keeps a would-be member from joining, then so be it. That's their choice.

I also believe that as an actor, Gerry has plenty of "yes" folks surrounding him and perhaps he would appreciate honest opinions from his fan base. After all, we are supposed to be the ones who truly support him. I don't like "tacky" ways of expressing one's views either, but as long as it is respectful, one is entitled to share it. I don't think that makes us a less supportive fan site by allowing for such comments.

It also saddens me and is disappointing to see that our stories, poems, drawings and graphics, etc., are considered to be just "schtuff". These things are from the heart and soul of their creators, whether they are about Gerry, making reference to Gerry or just putting our feelings out there. It's too bad that those who perhaps do not possess the creative gene, cannot appreciate those of us who do. That is something I failed to take in to consideration but consider me "enlightened".

Okay, this quote truly, well...you twisted my meaning entirely and so I'll give you a little History 101 on Dayna Linton aka Dr. Em.

I come from a very artistic family. All five of us children played at least one instrument. I played three. I was a dancer from the time I was eight and it was my minor in college. I took four years of drama and acted in numerous plays over the years. I have sung for audiences since I was in grade school and adore music in every respect. I have written poetry practically from the time I knew what poetry was. I have also written many short stories and truly adore the written word. One of my best friends is a USA Today Bestselling Author and I assist her with editing regularly. In addition to this website, I own a website for authors to help them promote their books.

I passed this love onto my children who all sing and play at least one instrument. My boys write and record music and my girls took dance when they were younger. I even converted the playroom into a studio so the boys could have a place to practice and record! In addition, because of my great love of the written word and sharing that with my children, my eldest son is currently attending university for his Master's in English Literature, which he plans to continue on for his Doctorate while teaching abroad.

So you see, my love of the arts in general is profound and to have my words take completely out of context offends me. "Schtuff" was only a playful/creative way of including all of the artistic endeavors into one word. The fact that you decided to read more into it than was necessary reminds me how often things can be taken out of context on a forum where the membership is very diverse.

I was not suggesting that anyone, nonmember or "troll" be limited to the site, just the personal postings of the members. Anyone can get all the information they need about Gerry here or a dozen other places on the internet. This isn't the only place. However, being able to view the comments from the members, some of which continually seem disappointed in Gerry's work but still remain a fan for some strange reason, some that seem to feel they "own" Gerry, know his personal whereabouts each minute of the day and continually correct or critisize other posters for their "lack of knowledge" of all things Gerry, can make the site appear less then what it was intended and unfriendly. If it is the consensus, then, of the moderating staff that these kinds of displays are acceptable, then far be it for me to argue.

The main reasoning for my suggestion was so that "fans" could be able to express their disappointments, their disapproval, their abhorrence and their negative view points, their love, adoration, possessiveness or obsession without the entire world seeing it and perhaps for those who wanted to voice their opinions, express their creative side or join in the conversations, there would be further incentive for them to become a member, which I thought of benefit to the site. Seems I was wrong on all counts and it's not that big of a deal.

I have to agree with you on this one aspect of fandom that does irritate me as well and that's when fans - who know Gerry strictly from films or brief encounters - seemingly become the "experts" on all things Gerry. Criticizing any member for their "lack of knowledge" of all things Gerry is just wrong on so many levels. But we, the Mod Squad, can't be everywhere 24/7 and when you see posts like that, you need only contact a member of the Squad. If we deem it unacceptable, we will make it invisible and it will be dealt with.

As for, in your opinion, negativity regarding Gerry being posted by fans (whom you can't understand why they are still fans), again, people are entitled to their opinions and perhaps some of these fans have been around a very long time and maybe, just maybe, Gerry has under performed, in their opinions. They still adore Gerry, but maybe have become a little disillusioned. As long as they express that opinion respectfully, who am I (or you) to tell them that makes them less than "good" fans? Obviously they are still supporting and interested in Gerry or why would they even frequent the site or buy movie tickets to see Gerry?

Further, regarding the negativity of some who seem to only post when they want to say negative things, we are truly perplexed about why these very few people feel compelled to do so, other than perhaps they believe that they are knocking some sense into the rest of us.  We feel that the best way to deal with these happiness vampires is to ignore their vitriol and move on with the intelligent respectful discussion.  They will be moderated should they cross over the line of respect. 

If those types of statements are left under the cloak of "membership only," if a guest decides to join thinking everything is sweetness and light all the time, don't you think THAT would bother them more? Why not be honest and open and have all opinions - positive and not so positive - available for all to see?

I don't understand why anyone would feel inhibited regarding sharing their honest opinion, I really don't. I personally feel everyone is entitled to share their RESPECTFUL opinions, if that is what they want to do and I don't think THEY should be ridiculed or attacked. That goes for sharing of both negative AND positive opinions.

I've heard from the other side complaining that GALS has become too homogenized and that people don't want to share their opinions for fear of being berated by "fanatical" members. If someone wants to gush or express their disappointment, it should be allowed. After all, I believe that adult, mature and respectful discussion can help us to see the differences in each other and perhaps appreciate others' points of view.

I do appreciate you sharing your thoughts and feelings regarding cloaking membership responses, but the bottomline is, after discussion and consideration by the team, the forum is not going to change to 'members only'.

~ D

P.S. I guess you're on a roll today, and you've written a lot more since I've had time to write this reply. I suppose I'll have to reply again. *sigh*

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... Another good reason for private posting....GUSHING! Getting offers based on showcasing ones sex appeal as the box office draw I would think is not where an actor wants to be. Sex appeal is a fleeting thing, desirability being based on talent lasts a lot longer. I think Gerard Butler is the hotest man walking the planet, hitit.gif but I also think he's a fine actor.

You have to keep in mind that the name of this site, GALS, is merely an acronym for Gerard Addicted LUST Syndrome. (An acronym that was created by our very own Dr. Em as a result of her CREATIVE WRITING at "another site.") Randy, public GUSHING and LUSTING over his pairson and his glorious body ... of work is the very foundation of this site. At this phase of my fandom, Gerry could look like an UGLY Phantom in real life, and I'd still be here for his PERSONALITY AND his EXTRAORDINARY TALENT!

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Delene

With due respect I do not go to that many other Gerry fansites but i am not aware of any of the major fansites that a new fan would come across first restriciting many of the comments on view to members only. We only have the Over 18 and a select few others on Gals. On all sites I go to the main things about News/Pics and All Things Gerry on all sites can be seen by all - why should Gals be any different??. If you feel so strongly why dont you set up a new Gerry website with members only access to everything - just a thought :wave:

I am a devoted fan but going by your comments because I did not 100% like everything about TBH I am being disrespectful to Gerry by publicly saying so on this forum?. Gerry does have alot of people who will bullshit him and I actually think he finds it refreshing that his fans can be honest. You've obviously not been round long enough to know that alot of the longtimers felt Gerry was the best thing about alot of his older movies but those movies themselves were just OK. Respectful discussions were held from way back.

I have to agree that as long as people are being respectful of each others opinions then if you find something not to your liking in one of his movies you should be able to say so without feeling you should shut the door on the way out :lmao: as you can no longer be a fan :pointy: I think the site is right not to allow speculation about certain things about Gerry as a person as that is disrespectful.

As for stuff said here being taken elsewhere and being discussed/dissed/ridiculed - if you cant stand the heat stay out of the kitchen - its the world wide web - a free for all and anyone who wants to put their most innner thoughts and feelings on it leaves themselves open - so if people are 100% confident in what they put then why should they give a rats arse what others say.

Moira

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When you are referring to him making "comments in jest", I take it you mean during interviews and things of that nature? Are you eluding that he is making those for our benefit in response to things we've said? I had no idea! Does he do that really? But the fact that you say that he would contact us when there is something that he doesn't appreciate, I would more believe that in his busy life, he doesn't have the time or the inclination to do that himself, not now, and rather has people in his employe that handle "site watching" for him. And if he did so, then why would he not contact us for the good stuff and not just anything untoward? How happy do you think it would make us if the announcement was made one day that Gerry had come on the site and lurked about for fun and he loves our stories and poems and all the graphics and art we do on his behalf? I'm afraid that's a pipe dream or there's something you're not telling me.

Delene - are you trying to prove the need for a private forum by publicly questioning and doubting what the Moderators are telling you? If so, it's not gonna work. It upsets me that you question and doubt what Holly has posted about the communication that Gerry has had with this site regarding what his feelings are about it. She isn't talking about him reading stories or poems (though perhaps he does, I've heard comments he made in the past that would indicate he may have read certain things, or else someone else told him about them) but he does visit sometimes and has admitted that he does. I'm sure his people do so for him as well, and if there is something he or they do not want on the site his people let us know. We are his fans but we are not sheep and I think he appreciates that we are capable of making and stating our own opinions even when they might not be positive.

You seem to want to continue the battle even after Dayna has given her decision and reasons for it, and this is her site. The moderators and other admins have discussed it for two days now (to the exclusion of other things, in some cases like doing our paid jobs), and we are in agreement that we like the way this site is now, we are happy with it being an open forum with just a few protected areas, and we like that many, many people have chosen to join this site because they WERE allowed to lurk and get a good feeling for what we are like before jumping into the pool with both feet. The fact that there MAY also be some people who don't join because they are afraid of an open forum I guess we will never know if they don't join and tell us so. I'm sure with the large number of fan sites out there they will be able to find another one that does have a closed forum - though they will have to join it without knowing anything about the people who are posting there unless they already have friends on those sites. We hope that you will continue to be a member of this site, I know your poetry is very much appreciated here, but the forum will be remaining open as it is now.

BTW, I also know that the word "schtuff" to which you took issue was simply a lighthearted means of including ALL the various types of artistic endeavors posted on this site by our members, whether they be poems, stories, drawings, graphics, or any number of other creations. I know absolutely NO disrespect of artistry was intended as most of us are very supportive of all artistic creations and most especially Dayna who comes from a very artistic family herself.

I hesitated posting at all because I am not inviting a further rebuttal. I was merely trying to explain that this is Dayna's site, and while she has the ultimate last word about how it is run, decisions are made as a group with our now fully ramped up and actively participating Mod Squad and on this matter The Squad Has Spoken.

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Delene ~

I have now read your latest rant and I hope you feel better.

There are MANY things that happen behind the scenes which, quite frankly, are none of your business. Having said that, I, like Susan, take exception to you questioning Holly about this. It does sound like you are inferring that you know something more. Really? Do tell.

Just to make something clear, the time you were "attacked" for your comment regarding Freddy, was, for the record, by me. I did NOT attack you and tried to continue a meaningful, adult conversation in PM's later, which was a total waste of time on my part and I had to say to you what I'm saying now.

You've made your point, it has been noted and we are done. Kaput. Finito.

~ D

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