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      Click here for links to our Social Media and GALS Site   03/22/2017

      Check us out at:  Gerard Butler GALS       - Twitter - Facebook - Pinterest - YouTube - Statigram & Instagram & Webstagram
       
    • becozy

      PHOTOBUCKET CHANGES WILL AFFECT OUR FORUM   07/13/2017

      Photobucket has changed their rules of usage. They are not allowing embedded photos to forums with the simple accounts all of us at GALS have. The mods are really annoyed - Photobucket wants $39.99 A MONTH which has to be paid in advance in one sum of $399!!! Can you imagine? Some of us have an account that should allow us to have our photos 'hot linked' as they call it, through December 2018.   There are alternative services, but they all are charging, too. This will mean the end of our avatars, signatures and images of Gerry that we're so fond of sharing in our posts.   Image Shack will still allow sharing, but they are charging for that service, although not as much as Photobucket.   The images cannot be hosted by GALS as that would drive up the cost of hosting, which we already struggle to pay.   We're looking into alternatives.   To find out more about the issue:  http://support.photobucket.com/hc/en-us/categories/200056995-Sharing-and-Linking   http://support.photobucket.com/hc/en-us/articles/115010128088-What-users-are-affected-by-the-changes-to-our-3rd-Party-Hosting-policies- If you were a Plus Account subscriber in good standing as of June 1, 2017,
      you will continue to have all the privileges you have enjoyed including 3rd
      Party Hosting until December 31, 2018 as long as you maintain your
      subscription. http://blog.photobucket.com/please-review-latest-changes-photobucket/

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irish

Gerry's Golden Girls

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Medicare Part G
 
If  you are an older senior citizen and can no longer take care of yourself and need Long-Term Care, but the government says there is no Nursing Home care available for you, what do you do?
 
You may opt for Medicare Part G.
 
The plan gives anyone 75 or older a gun (Part G) and one bullet.  You may then shoot one worthless politician. This means you will be sent to prison for the rest of your life where you will receive three meals a day, a roof over your head, central heating and air conditioning, cable TV, a library, and all the health care you need.  Need new teeth?  No problem. Need glasses?  That’s great.  Need a hearing aid, new hip, knees, kidney, lungs, sex change, or heart?  They are all covered!
 
As an added bonus, your kids can come and visit you at least as often as they do now!
 
And, who will be paying for all of this?  The same government that just told you they can't afford for you to go into a nursing home.
 
And you will get rid of a useless politician while you are at it.
 
And now, because you are a prisoner, you don't have to pay any more income taxes!
 
Is this a great country or what?
 
Now that you have solved your senior Long-Term Care problem, enjoy the rest of your week!
 
 

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Sounds like a good plan to me. Who says criminals are dumb. Commit a crime and everything is free from now on. This showed up written in one long line, up and down, one letter at a time. A challenge to read but I got it all. Maybe this shows that way on an iPad. Which is what I am using. I also had a hard time finding this topic. Things have changed around on GALS. 

~HUGS~ Kathy

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Well now, where do I apply?  Sounds great?

HAHAHA! 

:metoyou: Thanks, Barb!

Suzie

 

 

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Most seniors never get enough exercise.  In His wisdom God decreed that seniors become forgetful so they would have to search for their glasses, keys and other things thus doing more walking.  And God looked down and saw that it was good.
 
 
Then God saw there was another need.  In His wisdom He made seniors lose coordination so they would drop things requiring them to bend, reach and stretch.  And God looked down and saw that it was good.
 
 
Then God considered the function of bladders and decided seniors would have additional calls of nature requiring more trips to the bathroom, thus providing more exercise.  God looked down and saw that it was good.
 
 
So if you find as you age, you are getting up and down more, remember it’s God’s will.  It is all in your best interest even though you mutter under your breath.
 
 
Important Facts To Remember As We Grow Older:
 
 
No. 9
Death is the number 1 killer in the world.
 
 
No. 8
Life is sexually transmitted.
 
 
No. 7
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
 
 
No. 6
Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky-panky, and they can't tell them apart.  If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
 
 
No. 5
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day.  Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.
 
 
No. 4
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.
 
 
No. 3
All of us could take a lesson from the weather.  It pays no attention to criticism.
 
 
No. 2
In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird.  Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.
 
 
No. 1
Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers.  What you do today may be a burning issue tomorrow.
 
 
 
 
Please share this wisdom with others while I go to the bathroom again..........
 
 

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Great one, Bonnie. 

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:funnyup:  That's great, Bonnie!  

 

Suzie

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Recently ate at a restaurant where a table of girlfriends of a certain ag e were having a wonderful time, and came home and wrote this. You may recog nize somebody, maybe yourself ...

Lunch with girlfriends
By Kathy O’Malley

Elaine’s vertigo has never been worse
Kay can’t recall where she left her purse
Rhonda’s about to replace her knees
Linda’s breathing is tinged with a wheeze

Donna's left boob has a troublesome lump
Diane’s on her third trip to take a dump
Lorraine’s husband can’t remember a thing
Nine years a widow, Marge still wears her ring

Marlene is dealing with another UTI
Sally’s giving a hearing aid another try
Marie has decided she can’t drive at night
Sharon still wears clothes two sizes too tight

They’ve been through divorces and babies and wakes
They do for each other whatever it takes
They’ve already buried Marcia and Kate
And truthfully, Lizzie’s not looking so great

So whenever they can, they get out to eat
Open bottles of wine and forget their sore feet
There’s laughing and crying and letting down guards
And when the bill comes, there’s ten credit cards

So here’s to the waiters who keep orders straight
And to the places that let lunches run three hours late
And here’s to the girlfriends, those near and those far
Here's to the girlfriends, you know who you are

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:funnyup:  I definitely fit in that crowd...

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The New Doctor


A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a doctor who was retiring.

The older doctor suggested that the young one accompany him on his rounds, so the community could become used to a new doctor.

At the first house a woman complains, "I've been a little sick to my stomach."

The older doctor says, "Well, you've probably been overdoing the fresh fruit. Why not cut back on the amount you've been eating and see if that does the trick?"

As they left, the younger man said, "You didn't even examine that woman? How'd you come to the diagnosis so quickly?"

"I didn't have to. You noticed I dropped my stethoscope on the floor in there? When I bent over to pick it up, I noticed half dozen banana peels and apple cores in the rubbish bin. That was what probably was making her sick."

The younger doctor said "Pretty clever. If you don't mind, I think I'll try that at the next house."Arriving at the next house, they spent several minutes talking with a younger woman.She said that she just didn't have the energy she once did and
said, "I'm feeling terribly run down lately."

"You've probably been doing too much for the Church," the younger doctor told her.Perhaps you should cut back a bit and see if that helps."

As they left, the elder doctor said, "I know that woman well. Your diagnosis is almost certainly correct, she's very active in the church, but how did you arrive at it?"

"I did what you did at the last house. I dropped my stethoscope and, when I bent down to retrieve it, I noticed the minister under the bed."



 

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Good one, Lu! I needed the laugh and you gave it to me. ???????

 

~HUGS~ Kathy

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**snort**  I loved it!!  Thanks, Barb!:thankyou:

 

Suzie

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:funnyup: thanks for the laugh Barbara!

 

So I finally landed a job as a Wal-Mart greeter, which is a good find for many retirees, unfortunately I lasted less than a day.

About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance. Per my greeter training manual I said pleasantly, “Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart.” “Nice children you have there. Are they twins?”

The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, “Hell no, they ain’t twins. The oldest one is 9, and the other one is 7. Why the hell would you think they’re twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?”
So I replied, “I’m neither blind nor stupid, madam. I just couldn’t believe someone slept with you twice. Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.”

My supervisor said I probably wasn’t cut out for this line of work.

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Thanks for the laugh. Sue.  I'm looking for more to post!

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:lol: you gals have some 'good ones' for sure! Thanks for the giggles :D

 

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